http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Free Break up Help, Relationship Advice, and Plan to Get Your Ex Back en-US Sun, 21 Mar 2010 07:02:03 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/search.php http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/jaygirls-nc-diary/page/3#post-25876 Sun, 21 Mar 2010 00:56:04 +0000 jaygirlweek96 25876@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>One week NC so far. dreamt of my ex.....sucks! i just have to move on. i really have to move on. </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/how-i-lost-my-soulmatemy-breakup-story#post-25875 Sun, 21 Mar 2010 00:48:23 +0000 DenillaD 25875@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Ok, that's that thing called love. You need to start your NC diary now. Though our relationships are different, the experiences are alike. I do hope that u will reconnect with your love after your personal evolution. </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/rabbit-ncs/page/5#post-25874 Sun, 21 Mar 2010 00:14:52 +0000 absoluteclarity7 25874@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Rabbit I feel you. I know that someone could be out there but I feel like I would be settling. I am awaiting the return lol. i will be a stronger and more emotionally available male! I just hope she doesn't fall into too deep with the rebound. Until then, making schedules for myself and just abiding by it! </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/how-i-lost-my-soulmatemy-breakup-story#post-25873 Sun, 21 Mar 2010 00:01:52 +0000 absoluteclarity7 25873@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <blockquote><p><cite>absoluteclarity7 <a href="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/how-i-lost-my-soulmatemy-breakup-story#post-25871">said</a>:</cite><br /> My Break up Story<br /> Long but juicy lol</p> <p>I’ve know her since 6th grade. I remember I was very immature and was asking everyone "what does a woman’s private part look like?” I happened to ask her and she gave me a very dead face. Dead. </p> <p>For the three years of middle school, SM ignored me. We had seats right next to each other in basically every class and she ignored me lol. 8th grade came around, and we were just cool. Not friends but just cool with each other. Just a vibe. I remember she wrote in my middle school yearbook about how she regretted not talking to me because I turned out cool. Then high school came around. We were just acquaintances at best. We had most of the same classes once again but we kind of hung out in different groups. Then 11th grade was when it happened. I remember having a dream of her and we were having the most wildest, passionate lovemaking the world would ever witness. The dream told me I was going to end up with her and that she was going to be my wife. I woke up the next day with an extreme love for her. I remember I started to make minor advances to her but she never took me serious (when we talked about it years later, she said every time she came around me she would feel this intense love for me. The love was intense and she didn’t understand it and ran). I tried and tried but nothing worked. We knew there was something about us but we just didn’t know what. I remember telling all my friends about how I had the hugest crush on her. I would always say, “I don’t care if I am already married. I will leave her for SM!” </p> <p>All my friends could never understand why I was so attracted to her. I couldn’t explain it either. I just knew I loved her. She started dating a kid our senior year and it broke my heart. How come it wasn’t me? It crushed me. My first real heartbreak. I died and died over and over. She liked me I knew she did! Why would she not admit it? </p> <p>They continued the relationship in college. With the luck of the draw, me and SM ended up coming to the same college together. I remember we would always talk on AIM every night. It was our ritual. Even though she had her boyfriend, we were super cool with each other. I remember visiting her dorm room and chilling with her. I remember her saying that he was the one and that she was going to get married to him. Crushed me. Another occasion, she came over and I tried to advance on her. Blew up in my face lol. She freaked out and ran out and told her boyfriend. That created all sorts of drama. I remember I always was waiting for her. Just waiting. I don’t know why but I was. Then, I wasn’t waiting anymore. I started dating a girl older than me lol. She ended up breaking my heart to get back with her ex. </p> <p>Then, sophomore year of college started. I found an amazing girl named TA the first day of school in August and we started dating seriously months later. Then spring of my sophomore year came. I was in a fraternity and we had a step off and for some reason I invited SM. I shot her a text and didn’t expect her to come to the event. Its funny but looking back at all these pivotal set ups…</p> <p>Anyways, the step off happened and it turned out she showed up. I remember she invited me back to her house. I never made any advancement whatsoever and she liked it. I ended up sleeping over her house that night and we made out and snuggled. The very next day, I slept over and we made love. I cheated on my girlfriend with the woman of my dreams. This was in April. A week later, she broke up with her boyfriend that she had in high school. We started sleeping with each other and she always asked me what am I going to do about my girlfriend? When would I break up with her? I never did anything about it. We hung out and made love a lot. I started pushing away my girlfriend TA. Then summer came. I had an internship and we went out of the country. We emailed and texted each other almost every day. She came back into town and we made love for the whole weekend. I remember looking into her eyes and realizing oh my god, I’m falling in love with her. </p> <p>I had intense moments of guilt that I was cheating on my girlfriend. Why didn’t I leave her for SM? Because I don’t know really. I still had feelings for her. I was comfortable and attached to her.</p> <p>Then another school year started. I was waiting for her SM to hit me up or talk to me but she never did. I never did. We just didn’t talk to each other at all. I got super involved with my campus activities and my fraternity. I just pushed her out of mind with all types of stuff and just concentrated on my relationship with TA. No matter what, I thought about her every singe day. Every single day.<br /> Mid way through the semester I happened to see her and started walking next to her. She was having an angry conversation and I surprised her. I ended up driving her home and that was it (Years later, she told me she was actually cussing me out to her friend about how I just left her hanging. She was so hurt).<br /> The rest of the semester passed by. (Later on, she revealed to me during this semester she went through the most intense depression. She threw up all the time and she said her chest felt like it was being ripped into two. She showed me some of the love letters that she wrote during this time. She was deeply in love with me I remember one of them said, “Why can’t he see it? Why can’t he see it?”) </p> <p>Then, spring. I called her randomly one time in the beginning of the year. She was surprised. Months later, I got sick with the flu and was bedridden. I randomly texted her that I thought about her everyday. And she said the same thing also. She told me she was sick with the flu a week before me lol. Then we started emailing each other in April. We started talking again. We said, how come we always end up talking in April lol? We never met up till way later. Around May June I think. Maybe April. I don’t remember lol everything became a rush after this point. My girlfriend went back to her hometown during this time. What perfect timing?</p> <p>SM and I met during the summer. I was taking summer classes and she was just working. We met and hung out with some of our high school friends that happened to be in town. There was such a pull between us. I remember we were sitting in my bed with my friends chilling on the floor. Such a strong intense pull. After my friends left, we went to the parking lot and kissed. I remember the most intense bliss I have ever experienced in life. Fireworks went off, I was filled with love, and at that moment I knew she was the one. I remember our kiss was so powerful I didn’t feel like an individual anymore. We somehow merged.<br /> As the summer progressed we started hanging out more. She was dating someone and broke it off with them. She was still very hesitant of me because I broke he heart before. Shattered it. I was also still in a relationship with TA. At this point, TA and I were dating for a year and half. I loved her deeply. But she was in her hometown and she was considering not coming back to college because of the expenses. I thought this was my escape ticket! During the entire summer, me and SM became the best of friends. Then we slept together again. It was amazing. We did it every chance we got. Every time we made love, we became one. </p> <p>The most beautiful, blissful lovemaking ever. I would look into her eyes and knew she was the one. I would see myself in another body. I would feel timeless looking into her eyes. She felt the same way. I would look into her eyes and see promises and vows that we made to each other. I knew she was the one. The experience made me believe in past lives because when I looked into her eyes, I would see someone that I knew beyond this life. There is no other way to explain it. We had birthmarks in the same place. She would get this pain in her stomach and I would always feel it at the same time. I knew that no matter what either of us did, we were always going to end up together. I feel deeply in love this time. She knew we were soul mates since our last affair and I was just catching up. I loved her to death.</p> <p>Then my girlfriend came back into town after the summer ended. She decided to stay enrolled at the school. She came back in August. Instead of manning up and breaking if off with her, I stayed with her. I was getting my cake and eating it too. I was in a tug of war of love. I didn’t want to break up with my girlfriend because I didn’t want to break her heart. We started growing apart because my heart was not in the relationship any more. When she came back we had sex probably one time and it wasn’t even sex because I hated it. </p> <p>At the same time, SM would go through these cycles of ignoring me for a week and yelling at me to figure what I wanted but she would always come back after a week and we would be super in love with each other again. Did she just like the chase? Having something that she couldn’t have? Was the sex just good? Did she just have a lot of affection to give to someone and I was always there?</p> <p>I loved SM with all my heart. I knew she was my soul mate but I took her for granted. I was selfish. I didn’t want my girlfriend to be hurt and I was selfish. I was worried about my own happiness. I wanted to follow my heart with everything in me, but I couldn’t. It was like my body and mind couldn’t follow it. I wanted to be with her so bad but I just couldn’t. I felt as though the universe was controlling me. SM would get fed up for a week and cut contact off with me but she always ended up coming back. I knew I had her on lock. We loved each other. She was giving me 100% and I was only giving her 50%. The stress of breaking it off with my girlfriend coupled with the stress of life at the time (I was going through a whole yoga, new age, holistic, rainbow hippy child living phase), I didn’t give her all of me. I wish I would’ve. I sometimes didn’t answer her texts or her calls. Sometimes I would hang out with my girlfriend and turn off my phone for the night. There were times I realized I had attachment issues with my girlfriend because I would sleep over and just sleep next to her, no kissing or snuggling. Just be friends. I just couldn’t break her heart. We went through so much together. We were in a weird relationship limbo. We were friends with a relationship title. Just a fake “girlfriend”. It was so weird and fake. </p> <p>SM and I were still doing our thing however. We would go on dates and spend almost every night together making the most amazing love ever. December came around and me and SM made love on the beach for my birthday. Then her birthday came in January. That was the last time we made love. She got sick the next week and we couldn’t do anything physical. </p> <p>Then it happened. She asked me if I wanted to be friends with her or make it work. I was so surprised she asked me and I still wanted to stall breaking off completely with TA. I said I need a little space to breathe after being a relationship. I remember she punched me in the arm and the dead face girl from 6th grade came back.</p> <p>She started to withdraw from me and I remember texting her what’s going on? This was a few days after her birthday. I sensed something going on and I just knew she started talking to someone else. I could just sense it. I asked her about it and she said yes she went on date based on a whim. I called her and flipped out. She said she would never leave me but the new person started to make her think about how crappy I treated her. She started to get fed up. The more I pushed the more she ran. I saw her one night and we were in my car talking about it. She said one night she had a breakdown and was just fed up with my nonsense. She started to hate herself for loving me so much. She started to cry and said she could never trust a word I said. She was crying but at the same time really angry. She agreed to go to the movies with me the next day. We went to the movies and I remember her so dead and cold. What happened to the light in her eyes? Then I started getting upset that she wasn’t calling or texting me anymore. I became a text message terrorist. She let me come to her house and I remember the garbage can was clean. It sparked in my head, why did she take out the trash? Was she throwing out used condoms? I had so many insecurities and I didn’t want her to leave me. All those promises she made about always being there. All I asked for was patience to break it off with TA but she said she gave me more than enough time. How many chances did I need to see that we were meant to be? We started arguing. It turned to a shouting fest and her roommate came in to quiet me down. SM kicked me out of her house. I called and argued and went by her window to try and talk to her. I couldn’t believe how she was shutting me away so easily. Is this same person? I would’ve never down that to her. </p> <p>I started getting depressed. Really depressed. We tried another date. It was okay at best. It was not like old times at all. I tried to put on a happy face but no use. I tried to be dominant male that she first fell in love with. No use. We used to be around each other and just feel high in each others presence. Now she was dead. Just lifeless to me. At the end of the date she took off a parking decal from my car to her apartment complex and told me her roommate needed it for her friends coming into town. I don’t even know if that was the truth or not. Maybe the whole date was so that she could get the decal from me to give her new dude. </p> <p>Spring break was two weeks ago and I saw her before we left. It was cool at first. She was hesitant on the phone to see me but she let me see her. Everything was cool. Then I said I love you. She sighed and said I love you too. I will always love you. Then I started to push. Then why are you with someone else? She told me she was happier then she has ever been and that she was fed up with me. She said she could never trust me. She said that she thinks that she will never get over me. She wanted to forgive me but she’s not ready for it. Even if she forgave me, she just wanted to be friends. I hurt her so much. She said she doesn’t think about me anymore. How does she know I won’t cheat on her with someone else? I told her I loved only her and I wouldn’t do that. She said she has no trust for me whatsoever. She said the next person is amazing and they hang out all the time and she really likes him. I asked him if she slept with him and she said no. I still don’t know if that’s the truth. It was only a month and half from her birthday and after all the pushing I did, I don’t know if she did or didn’t.</p> <p>I asked her if she felt the same way anymore and she said no she didn’t and that she didn’t want to make it work. She was tired of me and my garbage. When I looked her eyes, I would see so much pain. She hated me and herself for all the stuff that we went through. She was upset that the second she found a guy that I all of sudden woke up and realized what I had. I broke all the rules of breakup and told her that I would change, I begged, pleaded, etc. The usual I was ready to give her the world if she would let me. She told me not to wait for me. She said she wished she moved on the first time. She told me to move on. Don’t wait. I asked her what I should do? I don’t know what to do. She said figure it out, stop being so needy, and go work on yourself. The irony. You were attrcate dto me for that reason and when I loose a little bit of myself to you, you run away. Karma lol. As she left, she looked so empowered to finally get rid of me. I broke all the break up rules. I chased and pleaded. My how the tables turn. Dam I wish I found this forum and MOMU earlier. It was like she got her revenge for all the pain I put her through. I remember looking like a bitch as she walked away. I tried to hug her and she got upset. She walked away and said Hey remember you have no decal on your car. It might get towed. That hurt a lot. She just looked so evil and heartless.</p> <p>A day later I texted her, “search your heart, search your heart, search your heart…” No response. I wasn’t surprised. I am good friends with her brother and I asked him if she talked about me at all and he said yes. Every time she brought me up she would start to cry and get really upset. I asked if she was talking about this new person and he said no. Weeks earlier I asked him if he thought they were sleeping together and he said he told her to go really slow especially after the whole thing with me. He said he thinks the guy is comforting her and just giving her everything she’s wanted. She has wanted to be with me for so long she just got tired of longing for me. </p> <p>She went to Costa Rica later on in the break with three of her friends which by the way all hate me for all the things I’ve done especially with the recent shout fest on top of it. The break ended and I texted her on Sunday, “Hey SM, how was your break?” I got nothing. She called me the next day and I ignored it. Then I called her back on Tuesday. We had a brief catch up convo. I saw her in the library on Wednesday. She looked like a brand new person. She looked so happpppppyyyyyyy and everything was going perfect. She was so different though. A different happy then I what I remembered. It seemed fake but real…just something was off about her. Like she was burying her pain nd masquerading it with this happiness. Maybe she truly is happy. I remember reading something in Williams blogs about not allowing that dead person to come to the grave. Just let them die. Peacefully. It’s weird but that’s how I felt. That wasn’t her anymore. It was like some demon woman was taking her body. I felt her vamping on me during the conversation also. I feel like such a bitch lap dog and she vamped me of my pride. I was a little emasculated boy. After she left, I left the library went home and had a breakdown. I felt her vamping me. Getting a rush off of me. I started scouring the internet on how to get her back. I discovered the MOMU book and saw the no contact rule. I wasn’t convinced. Then I went deeper and found this website. I love it! It’s full of information and different points of view. And a family!</p> <p>I’m scared that she won’t talk to me like the first time we broke our affair two years ago. But I’m hoping the connection that we made will triumph over all. I sit here and wonder just like everyone else, “was that real?”. Even though she was not my girlfriend, we had a relationship. There was something special between us. Something indescribable. I hate myself for two timing but you have to understand that we couldn’t leave each other alone. There was a pull between us. A magnet. I didn’t give my all and that is stacked heavily against me. I lied to SM less than a handful and didn’t shower her with half as many gifts as she has showered me. She was just trying to win my love? This new rebound guy must be giving her all the love and attention in the world right now. She’s probably getting catered. I don’t know if she’s trying to get over me once and for all or she’s trying to convince herself there is love out there for her. Maybe there is. Maybe this is really it. It’s over?</p> <p>After I sent the NC email, the hole in my chest got smaller lol. Am I supposed to move on? Do I have to live with the rest of my life knowing I messed up not once but two times at my chance with my soulmate? She was perfect for me. Now it’s gone like the wind. I love her deeply in ways I cannot explain and want her back. That’s why I joined this forum. What else do I have to loose? She sends me mixed signals and I feel like she wants to keep me around as her little whipping boy. Her eyes say ha-ha! I have the final joke! Look who’s hurting now? </p> <p>After the library incident, I knew I had to break away somehow. The tables are turned and karma is on me. Through the whole thing, I have been learning a lot about myself. Maybe that was the whole point of us meeting. To jump start some evolution spark in us. I know she feels like I was a complete mistake and after writing this letter maybe I was a mistake. I really do love her I just couldn’t bring myself to break TAs heart. Now it’s too late. However, this rebound person shows me that she still does not know how to be by herself. Is she love crazy and I just got caught up? Maybe this is karma and I should just leave this alone. She broke off two relationships for me and gone through an intense depression for me. Maybe I should really just leave this alone. Have you ever heard the term, “Perfect person, wrong timing?” Everyday since I started NC, I feel less strangled for some reason. Like her grip is leaving me.</p> <p>I sent the message and she still hasn’t emailed me back. Maybe she really is gone. I’m not exactly desperate but I want her back. It’s so funny because I feel different. Like our connection is severered now. Was our relationship really just about the sex? What were those moments we shared? I just can’t shake this feeling deep within me that we are going to be together. Maybe its still me ego’s attachment.</p> <p>I was a dumb asshole and I’m reaping what I sowed. This forum is awesome because I feel I have some degree of control over my life. I actually like the blogs A LOT better than the MOMU book. It goes into better depth and S. Williams is awesome. He seems like he has a lot of experience and realize that these heartbreaks are part of a bigger picture. We have experienced true love and for us to love again we have to mend our hearts first and foremost. If this is my soulmate, she has exposed everything that I need to work on myself. I am willing to try anything at this point and this website is the only thing that makes sense so far. I am very scared that she will forget me and move one but what do I have to loose? She already kicked me to the curb. </p> <p>Does anyone think I really have a chance? She is super fed up and it seems like she really wants to move on. I’ve been told once a woman is fed up, she’s fed up. It has been about three days since I sent the message and nothing back. I hope NC can work miracles and I will follow it to the letter because this will help me evolve also. I stopped all the yoga, reiki, qigong stuff because of this situation. I was becoming too detached from the outer world and tried to control my reality by trying to be a superman. Now everything has blown in my face. This is such a terrible situation but at least I we don’t have to worry about finances or kids like some of you guys. My heart goes out to you and I‘ll pray for you guys. Guess I got to count my blessings. I feel so uncertain. I was sure that we were meant to be now I think neither of us know that now. I have a flicker of hope and I am letting God handle it. I’m hoping NC will show me if we were meant to be. If its true love, it will come back. I want the cycle of push and pull to end finally. I love her to death and I regret not paying attention to her. I would literally do anything for her. She is the best I will ever have. I swear I want this forever. I love you SM. </p></blockquote> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/absolute-claritys-nc-diary#post-25872 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 23:46:49 +0000 absoluteclarity7 25872@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Here's my story: </p> <p><a href="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/how-i-lost-my-soulmatemy-breakup-story?replies=1#post-25871" rel="nofollow">http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/how-i-lost-my-soulmatemy-breakup-story?replies=1#post-25871</a></p> <p>I stumbled across this forum after a breakdown on the 18th. As soon as I saw the NC message I just knew I had nothing to lose. After I sent it, a huge burden was lifted off my chest for some reason. I'm so grateful to meet others going through it. So, I'll just catch you guys up to what Ive been doing the past two-three days of NC.</p> <p>Day One:<br /> The first day was hard. I felt her tugging on me some how. Like she was still sapping my energy. We have been slowly separating the past two months but I feel like she was reaching for the psychic connection that we had. She just knew it was cut. I felt good and empowered for some reason. I got a piece of myself back lol.</p> <p>Day 2:<br /> Woke up thinking about her. Miss her smell so much. I called friends and went to a dance rave for the first time tonight. It was a lot of fun. There was a lot of girls but I knew I was not ready to move on. Even though she has rebound, I just can't do it. No one has that spark like she did. I'm not even remotely attracted to anything (she used to tell me this all time. ehh its in the past doesn't count now I guess lol). This is weird: I feel like somehow my ex put some kind of "stay away sign" on me. Or maybe it's just my insecurities, but a girl would get close to me and would be interested and then they would just stop dancing with me or just walk away. Even though I looked okay, I think they could tell I was faking my confidence. I was having fun but I just want to be confident and awesome for my SM. Who isn't in my life right now, so i just need to be confident for myself. Will I ever look at anyone else ever again? It sucks meeting your soul mate and then they chuck the deuces. Leaves you in the dark.</p> <p>Day Three(today):<br /> Ive been listening to a lot of self helps books. A good one is Maximum Achievement by Brian Tracy (you should youtube him! he's awesome). </p> <p>Here is some good lines I think everyone would love,<br /> If I want things to change, I must change first.<br /> Focus mind on future, rather than the past.<br /> Forgive everyone (even our exs for leaving us hanging even when they promised over and over they would "always be there") to get rid of negative energy.<br /> Say: "I forgive him/her for everything" to cancel out negative memories.<br /> Calmly and confidently say, "This resolution is resolved happily with all concerned."<br /> Release the situation completely!<br /> All advancements needs change! Goals allows you to direct change.<br /> Motivation requires motive.<br /> Every set back lets you know you are getting closer!</p> <p>I'm starting to realize that if God allowed me to have experience this love I can A: find it within myself since I kindof remember what it felt like...just turn that love inwards and just love myself unconditionally and B: I can find it again if I return to the cool care free guy. Right now, I'm trying to organize my life. I'm graduating college and I have no idea what I am doing. I've been trying to find the momentum within me to get things done. I just feel so sapped from the entire situation sometimes because it has been a tug of war between us since middle school. I miss her alot and woud just love the feel the warmth of her breathe. She hasn't responded to my email. I was tempted to send it to her again on Facebook because she doesn't check her email all the time, but F it! </p> <p>She'll read it eventually. I feel that she has already. I wanted her to respond and show something but nothing thus far. It kind of makes me nervous. Will this be the tone for the next 30 days? Complete silence? I'm hoping NC will bring her back to the way she used to be. Like a reset button lol. I guess we will see. Williams knows his stuff and I really have nothing to lose. I won't become your lapdog for you to sap on. I love you to death and I hope you return as who you were when we were in love. LOL. </p> <p>As I wrote that, I realize that she probably said that line in her head wishing for me to correct myself. Sigh. It's all good though. I'm keeping my spirits up! I just miss her smell so much and the way she used to hug me! Do you think they can come back after a dramatic episode? Even if they are super super super fed up with you? This entire thing is a very valuable learning experience so I will learn and deal with this temporary glitch in the matrix lol. I miss my lady in the red dress lol. </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/how-i-lost-my-soulmatemy-breakup-story#post-25871 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 23:04:30 +0000 absoluteclarity7 25871@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>My Break up Story<br /> Long but juicy lol</p> <p>I’ve know her since 6th grade. I remember I was very immature and was asking everyone "what does a women’s private part look like?” I happened to ask her and she gave me a very dead face. Dead. </p> <p>For the three years of middle school, SM ignored me. We had seats right next to each other in basically every class and she ignored me lol. 8th grade came around, and we were just cool. Not friends but just cool with each other. Just a vibe. I remember she wrote in my middle school yearbook about how she regretted not talking to me because I turned out cool. Then high school came around. We were just acquaintances at best. We had most of the same classes once again but we kind of hung out in different groups. Then 11th grade was when it happened. I remember having a dream of her and we were having the most wildest, passionate lovemaking the world would ever witness. The dream told me I was going to end up with her and that she was going to be my wife. I woke up the next day with an extreme love for her. I remember I started to make minor advances to her but she never took me serious (when we talked about it years later, she said every time she came around me she would feel this intense love for me. The love was intense and she didn’t understand it and ran). I tried and tried but nothing worked. We knew there was something about us but we just didn’t know what. I remember telling all my friends about how I had the hugest crush on her. I would always say, “I don’t care if I am already married. I will leave her for SM!” </p> <p>All my friends could never understand why I was so attracted to her. I couldn’t explain it either. I just knew I loved her. She started dating a kid our senior year and it broke my heart. How come it wasn’t me? It crushed me. My first real heartbreak. I died and died over and over. She liked me I knew she did! Why would she not admit it? </p> <p>They continued the relationship in college. With the luck of the draw, me and SM ended up coming to the same college together. I remember we would always talk on AIM every night. It was our ritual. Even though she had her boyfriend, we were super cool with each other. I remember visiting her dorm room and chilling with her. I remember her saying that he was the one and that she was going to get married to him. Crushed me. Another occasion, she came over and I tried to advance on her. Blew up in my face lol. She freaked out and ran out and told her boyfriend. That created all sorts of drama. I remember I always was waiting for her. Just waiting. I don’t know why but I was. Then, I wasn’t waiting anymore. I started dating a girl older than me lol. She ended up breaking my heart to get back with her ex. </p> <p>Then, sophomore year of college started. I found an amazing girl named TA the first day of school in August and we started dating seriously months later. Then spring of my sophomore year came. I was in a fraternity and we had a step off and for some reason I invited SM. I shot her a text and didn’t expect her to come to the event. Its funny but looking back at all these pivotal set ups…</p> <p>Anyways, the step off happened and it turned out she showed up. I remember she invited me back to her house. I never made any advancement whatsoever and she liked it. I ended up sleeping over her house that night and we made out and snuggled. The very next day, I slept over and we made love. I cheated on my girlfriend with the woman of my dreams. This was in April. A week later, she broke up with her boyfriend that she had in high school. We started sleeping with each other and she always asked me what am I going to do about my girlfriend? When would I break up with her? I never did anything about it. We hung out and made love a lot. I started pushing away my girlfriend TA. Then summer came. I had an internship and we went out of the country. We emailed and texted each other almost every day. She came back into town and we made love for the whole weekend. I remember looking into her eyes and realizing oh my god, I’m falling in love with her. </p> <p>I had intense moments of guilt that I was cheating on my girlfriend. Why didn’t I leave her for SM? Because I don’t know really. I still had feelings for her. I was comfortable and attached to her.</p> <p>Then another school year started. I was waiting for her SM to hit me up or talk to me but she never did. I never did. We just didn’t talk to each other at all. I got super involved with my campus activities and my fraternity. I just pushed her out of mind with all types of stuff and just concentrated on my relationship with TA. No matter what, I thought about her every singe day. Every single day.<br /> Mid way through the semester I happened to see her and started walking next to her. She was having an angry conversation and I surprised her. I ended up driving her home and that was it (Years later, she told me she was actually cussing me out to her friend about how I just left her hanging. She was so hurt).<br /> The rest of the semester passed by. (Later on, she revealed to me during this semester she went through the most intense depression. She threw up all the time and she said her chest felt like it was being ripped into two. She showed me some of the love letters that she wrote during this time. She was deeply in love with me I remember one of them said, “Why can’t he see it? Why can’t he see it?”) </p> <p>Then, spring. I called her randomly one time in the beginning of the year. She was surprised. Months later, I got sick with the flu and was bedridden. I randomly texted her that I thought about her everyday. And she said the same thing also. She told me she was sick with the flu a week before me lol. Then we started emailing each other in April. We started talking again. We said, how come we always end up talking in April lol? We never met up till way later. Around May June I think. Maybe April. I don’t remember lol everything became a rush after this point. My girlfriend went back to her hometown during this time. What perfect timing?</p> <p>SM and I met during the summer. I was taking summer classes and she was just working. We met and hung out with some of our high school friends that happened to be in town. There was such a pull between us. I remember we were sitting in my bed with my friends chilling on the floor. Such a strong intense pull. After my friends left, we went to the parking lot and kissed. I remember the most intense bliss I have ever experienced in life. Fireworks went off, I was filled with love, and at that moment I knew she was the one. I remember our kiss was so powerful I didn’t feel like an individual anymore. We somehow merged.<br /> As the summer progressed we started hanging out more. She was dating someone and broke it off with them. She was still very hesitant of me because I broke he heart before. Shattered it. I was also still in a relationship with TA. At this point, TA and I were dating for a year and half. I loved her deeply. But she was in her hometown and she was considering not coming back to college because of the expenses. I thought this was my escape ticket! During the entire summer, me and SM became the best of friends. Then we slept together again. It was amazing. We did it every chance we got. Every time we made love, we became one. </p> <p>The most beautiful, blissful lovemaking ever. I would look into her eyes and knew she was the one. I would see myself in another body. I would feel timeless looking into her eyes. She felt the same way. I would look into her eyes and see promises and vows that we made to each other. I knew she was the one. The experience made me believe in past lives because when I looked into her eyes, I would see someone that I knew beyond this life. There is no other way to explain it. We had birthmarks in the same place. She would get this pain in her stomach and I would always feel it at the same time. I knew that no matter what either of us did, we were always going to end up together. I feel deeply in love this time. She knew we were soul mates since our last affair and I was just catching up. I loved her to death.</p> <p>Then my girlfriend came back into town after the summer ended. She decided to stay enrolled at the school. She came back in August. Instead of manning up and breaking if off with her, I stayed with her. I was getting my cake and eating it too. I was in a tug of war of love. I didn’t want to break up with my girlfriend because I didn’t want to break her heart. We started growing apart because my heart was not in the relationship any more. When she came back we had sex probably one time and it wasn’t even sex because I hated it. </p> <p>At the same time, SM would go through these cycles of ignoring me for a week and yelling at me to figure what I wanted but she would always come back after a week and we would be super in love with each other again. Did she just like the chase? Having something that she couldn’t have? Was the sex just good? Did she just have a lot of affection to give to someone and I was always there?</p> <p>I loved SM with all my heart. I knew she was my soul mate but I took her for granted. I was selfish. I didn’t want my girlfriend to be hurt and I was selfish. I was worried about my own happiness. I wanted to follow my heart with everything in me, but I couldn’t. It was like my body and mind couldn’t follow it. I wanted to be with her so bad but I just couldn’t. I felt as though the universe was controlling me. SM would get fed up for a week and cut contact off with me but she always ended up coming back. I knew I had her on lock. We loved each other. She was giving me 100% and I was only giving her 50%. The stress of breaking it off with my girlfriend coupled with the stress of life at the time (I was going through a whole yoga, new age, holistic, rainbow hippy child living phase), I didn’t give her all of me. I wish I would’ve. I sometimes didn’t answer her texts or her calls. Sometimes I would hang out with my girlfriend and turn off my phone for the night. There were times I realized I had attachment issues with my girlfriend because I would sleep over and just sleep next to her, no kissing or snuggling. Just be friends. I just couldn’t break her heart. We went through so much together. We were in a weird relationship limbo. We were friends with a relationship title. Just a fake “girlfriend”. It was so weird and fake. </p> <p>SM and I were still doing our thing however. We would go on dates and spend almost every night together making the most amazing love ever. December came around and me and SM made love on the beach for my birthday. Then her birthday came in January. That was the last time we made love. She got sick the next week and we couldn’t do anything physical. </p> <p>Then it happened. She asked me if I wanted to be friends with her or make it work. I was so surprised she asked me and I still wanted to stall breaking off completely with TA. I said I need a little space to breathe after being a relationship. I remember she punched me in the arm and the dead face girl from 6th grade came back.</p> <p>She started to withdraw from me and I remember texting her what’s going on? This was a few days after her birthday. I sensed something going on and I just knew she started talking to someone else. I could just sense it. I asked her about it and she said yes she went on date based on a whim. I called her and flipped out. She said she would never leave me but the new person started to make her think about how crappy I treated her. She started to get fed up. The more I pushed the more she ran. I saw her one night and we were in my car talking about it. She said one night she had a breakdown and was just fed up with my nonsense. She started to hate herself for loving me so much. She started to cry and said she could never trust a word I said. She was crying but at the same time really angry. She agreed to go to the movies with me the next day. We went to the movies and I remember her so dead and cold. What happened to the light in her eyes? Then I started getting upset that she wasn’t calling or texting me anymore. I became a text message terrorist. She let me come to her house and I remember the garbage can was clean. It sparked in my head, why did she take out the trash? Was she throwing out used condoms? I had so many insecurities and I didn’t want her to leave me. All those promises she made about always being there. All I asked for was patience to break it off with TA but she said she gave me more than enough time. How many chances did I need to see that we were meant to be? We started arguing. It turned to a shouting fest and her roommate came in to quiet me down. SM kicked me out of her house. I called and argued and went by her window to try and talk to her. I couldn’t believe how she was shutting me away so easily. Is this same person? I would’ve never down that to her. </p> <p>I started getting depressed. Really depressed. We tried another date. It was okay at best. It was not like old times at all. I tried to put on a happy face but no use. I tried to be dominant male that she first fell in love with. No use. We used to be around each other and just feel high in each others presence. Now she was dead. Just lifeless to me. At the end of the date she took off a parking decal from my car to her apartment complex and told me her roommate needed it for her friends coming into town. I don’t even know if that was the truth or not. Maybe the whole date was so that she could get the decal from me to give her new dude. </p> <p>Spring break was two weeks ago and I saw her before we left. It was cool at first. She was hesitant on the phone to see me but she let me see her. Everything was cool. Then I said I love you. She sighed and said I love you too. I will always love you. Then I started to push. Then why are you with someone else? She told me she was happier then she has ever been and that she was fed up with me. She said she could never trust me. She said that she thinks that she will never get over me. She wanted to forgive me but she’s not ready for it. Even if she forgave me, she just wanted to be friends. I hurt her so much. She said she doesn’t think about me anymore. How does she know I won’t cheat on her with someone else? I told her I loved only her and I wouldn’t do that. She said she has no trust for me whatsoever. She said the next person is amazing and they hang out all the time and she really likes him. I asked him if she slept with him and she said no. I still don’t know if that’s the truth. It was only a month and half from her birthday and after all the pushing I did, I don’t know if she did or didn’t.</p> <p>I asked her if she felt the same way anymore and she said no she didn’t and that she didn’t want to make it work. She was tired of me and my garbage. When I looked her eyes, I would see so much pain. She hated me and herself for all the stuff that we went through. She was upset that the second she found a guy that I all of sudden woke up and realized what I had. I broke all the rules of breakup and told her that I would change, I begged, pleaded, etc. The usual I was ready to give her the world if she would let me. She told me not to wait for me. She said she wished she moved on the first time. She told me to move on. Don’t wait. I asked her what I should do? I don’t know what to do. She said figure it out, stop being so needy, and go work on yourself. The irony. You were attrcate dto me for that reason and when I loose a little bit of myself to you, you run away. Karma lol. As she left, she looked so empowered to finally get rid of me. I broke all the break up rules. I chased and pleaded. My how the tables turn. Dam I wish I found this forum and MOMU earlier. It was like she got her revenge for all the pain I put her through. I remember looking like a bitch as she walked away. I tried to hug her and she got upset. She walked away and said Hey remember you have no decal on your car. It might get towed. That hurt a lot. She just looked so evil and heartless.</p> <p>A day later I texted her, “search your heart, search your heart, search your heart…” No response. I wasn’t surprised. I am good friends with her brother and I asked him if she talked about me at all and he said yes. Every time she brought me up she would start to cry and get really upset. I asked if she was talking about this new person and he said no. Weeks earlier I asked him if he thought they were sleeping together and he said he told her to go really slow especially after the whole thing with me. He said he thinks the guy is comforting her and just giving her everything she’s wanted. She has wanted to be with me for so long she just got tired of longing for me. </p> <p>She went to Costa Rica later on in the break with three of her friends which by the way all hate me for all the things I’ve done especially with the recent shout fest on top of it. The break ended and I texted her on Sunday, “Hey SM, how was your break?” I got nothing. She called me the next day and I ignored it. Then I called her back on Tuesday. We had a brief catch up convo. I saw her in the library on Wednesday. She looked like a brand new person. She looked so happpppppyyyyyyy and everything was going perfect. She was so different though. A different happy then I what I remembered. It seemed fake but real…just something was off about her. Like she was burying her pain nd masquerading it with this happiness. Maybe she truly is happy. I remember reading something in Williams blogs about not allowing that dead person to come to the grave. Just let them die. Peacefully. It’s weird but that’s how I felt. That wasn’t her anymore. It was like some demon woman was taking her body. I felt her vamping on me during the conversation also. I feel like such a bitch lap dog and she vamped me of my pride. I was a little emasculated boy. After she left, I left the library went home and had a breakdown. I felt her vamping me. Getting a rush off of me. I started scouring the internet on how to get her back. I discovered the MOMU book and saw the no contact rule. I wasn’t convinced. Then I went deeper and found this website. I love it! It’s full of information and different points of view. And a family!</p> <p>I’m scared that she won’t talk to me like the first time we broke our affair two years ago. But I’m hoping the connection that we made will triumph over all. I sit here and wonder just like everyone else, “was that real?”. Even though she was not my girlfriend, we had a relationship. There was something special between us. Something indescribable. I hate myself for two timing but you have to understand that we couldn’t leave each other alone. There was a pull between us. A magnet. I didn’t give my all and that is stacked heavily against me. I lied to SM less than a handful and didn’t shower her with half as many gifts as she has showered me. She was just trying to win my love? This new rebound guy must be giving her all the love and attention in the world right now. She’s probably getting catered. I don’t know if she’s trying to get over me once and for all or she’s trying to convince herself there is love out there for her. Maybe there is. Maybe this is really it. It’s over?</p> <p>After I sent the NC email, the hole in my chest got smaller lol. Am I supposed to move on? Do I have to live with the rest of my life knowing I messed up not once but two times at my chance with my soulmate? She was perfect for me. Now it’s gone like the wind. I love her deeply in ways I cannot explain and want her back. That’s why I joined this forum. What else do I have to loose? She sends me mixed signals and I feel like she wants to keep me around as her little whipping boy. Her eyes say ha-ha! I have the final joke! Look who’s hurting now? </p> <p>After the library incident, I knew I had to break away somehow. The tables are turned and karma is on me. Through the whole thing, I have been learning a lot about myself. Maybe that was the whole point of us meeting. To jump start some evolution spark in us. I know she feels like I was a complete mistake and after writing this letter maybe I was a mistake. I really do love her I just couldn’t bring myself to break TAs heart. Now it’s too late. However, this rebound person shows me that she still does not know how to be by herself. Is she love crazy and I just got caught up? Maybe this is karma and I should just leave this alone. She broke off two relationships for me and gone through an intense depression for me. Maybe I should really just leave this alone. Have you ever heard the term, “Perfect person, wrong timing?” Everyday since I started NC, I feel less strangled for some reason. Like her grip is leaving me.</p> <p>I sent the message and she still hasn’t emailed me back. Maybe she really is gone. I’m not exactly desperate but I want her back. It’s so funny because I feel different. Like our connection is severered now. Was our relationship really just about the sex? What were those moments we shared? I just can’t shake this feeling deep within me that we are going to be together. Maybe its still me ego’s attachment.</p> <p>I was a dumb asshole and I’m reaping what I sowed. This forum is awesome because I feel I have some degree of control over my life. I actually like the blogs A LOT better than the MOMU book. It goes into better depth and S. Williams is awesome. He seems like he has a lot of experience and realize that these heartbreaks are part of a bigger picture. We have experienced true love and for us to love again we have to mend our hearts first and foremost. If this is my soulmate, she has exposed everything that I need to work on myself. I am willing to try anything at this point and this website is the only thing that makes sense so far. I am very scared that she will forget me and move one but what do I have to loose? She already kicked me to the curb. </p> <p>Does anyone think I really have a chance? She is super fed up and it seems like she really wants to move on. I’ve been told once a woman is fed up, she’s fed up. It has been about three days since I sent the message and nothing back. I hope NC can work miracles and I will follow it to the letter because this will help me evolve also. I stopped all the yoga, reiki, qigong stuff because of this situation. I was becoming too detached from the outer world and tried to control my reality by trying to be a superman. Now everything has blown in my face. This is such a terrible situation but at least I we don’t have to worry about finances or kids like some of you guys. My heart goes out to you and I‘ll pray for you guys. Guess I got to count my blessings. I feel so uncertain. I was sure that we were meant to be now I think neither of us know that now. I have a flicker of hope and I am letting God handle it. I’m hoping NC will show me if we were meant to be. If its true love, it will come back. I want the cycle of push and pull to end finally. I love her to death and I regret not paying attention to her. I would literally do anything for her. She is the best I will ever have. I swear I want this forever. I love you SM. </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/rabbit-ncs/page/4#post-25870 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 22:48:48 +0000 Rabbit 25870@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>My work and my best girl-friends were keeping me very busy for the past couples of days, I was not at my happiest self for the past days ~ bad lucks had been following me!! My teeth broke when I was eating my fries, then my car's wind shield was damaged by a flying rock from nowhere. Oh well, hope my bad luck was done for the week.</p> <p>Two of my old friends called me up this weekend for dinner and drinks, and we spent quality times together. One of them will be having her wedding this coming October, we were talking about what I should be wearing to her wedding tonight. We laugh and share our life. At last, I am starting to go back to normal ~ I am not missing my ex as much. My sickness was gone, I guess that why!!</p> <p>Hope everyone is doing great and staying strong here!! </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/love4learning-no-contact-diary/page/3#post-25869 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 21:57:22 +0000 love4learning 25869@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>PV and Silver I am glad that you enjoyed the article. I found strength in reading it as well. There are several other ones that are just as good under the Inspirational Articles and Stories thread of the forum. Hope all is well for both of you.</p> <p>I just got in from the comedy club. The performance was great. However, I am noticing as I am evolving, I am starting to discover that I am becoming a misfit with some of my "so called" friends as well. I find <u>some</u> women to be insecure and "catty". I guess I will have to go NC and replenish female friends as well. Oh well.</p> <p>But, I am done trying to please other people. Accept me as I am or get to steppin! I will no longer downplay my happiness, my intelligence, or anything else about me that makes me uniquely me so that someone else can feel comfortable. As the author of "Why Men Love Bitches" says <strong>This is me in all my glory and it doesn't get any better than this!</strong>. </p> <p>I say get a life or get the hell on. My days of trying to please the unpleasing are over. And, my days of putting up with petty ass comments from silly ass women are over too. More people need to spend time in solitude and get to know themselves so that they won't feel the need to put others down in order to feel good about themselves AND/OR so that they can "appear" superior. </p> <p>I don't think we really understand how dumb and silly we look when we are searching all outside of ourselves to find us. AND/OR trying to validate ourselves by other people's approval or by invalidating others. </p> <p>We have to do the work inside out. NOT, outside in. Boundaries is what I am learning. And, I will use them and <strong><u>enforce them heavily</u></strong>. I have <strong>STANDARDS</strong> as to how I want to be treated. I really don't care if other people think they are too high.</p> <p>They are mine damnit. I will not let people treat me any ole kind of way and think they will continue to enjoy my companionship and/or friendship. I don't think so! So, for all the male and female predators, I say GOOD DAMN RIDDANCE. And, BUH-BYE. &lt;img src=&quot;http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_wave.gif&quot; title=&quot;:wave:&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> <p>I will be alone before I deal with trifling ass people who do not value and respect my worth. &lt;img src=&quot;http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_rant.gif&quot; title=&quot;:rant:&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> <p><strong><em>“It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.”<br /> -Teddy Roosevelt’s “Citizenship in a Republic,” Speech at the Sorbonne, Paris, April 23, 1910</em></strong> </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/jolyths-nc-diary/page/4#post-25868 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 20:35:52 +0000 silverwolf9 25868@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Great attitude MJ! Just keep focusing on you and you will be just fine. Stay strong! </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/love4learning-no-contact-diary/page/3#post-25867 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 20:31:19 +0000 silverwolf9 25867@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Thanks for posting that article! It was very helpful. And I'm glad you are doing so well with your evolution. Keep up the good work! </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/silverwolf9s-nc-diary#post-25866 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 20:19:01 +0000 silverwolf9 25866@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>It's been over a week since I initiated NC. I've decided not to keep track of the exact number of days that it has been since the length of time isn't nearly as important as how well my evolution in coming along. I'm going to try not to worry about how long it has been since I last spoke to him and concentrate on improving myself right now.</p> <p>I'm doing pretty good right now. I admit that I definitely still miss him and there are times where I start to worry about what he is doing and whether or not he misses me. When that happens I just keep telling myself that "I don't care what he's doing. It doesn't matter." I know that it is for the best that I don;t talk to him right now because I would just make things worse. So I'm stopping the self-pity and getting myself focused. I've accepted that the old relationship is dead. If he and I do get back together it will have to be a completely new relationship, because the old one didn't work. So now that I've accepted this I'm trying to really focus on what I need to do to improve myself. Here are the things I'm going to focus on right now:</p> <p>1. My nutrition - my goal is to start eating better (more fruits and veggies), taking a vitamin every day, and drink more water<br /> 2. Exercise - Going to go to the gym 3 times a week and start doing yoga every morning like I used to.<br /> 3. My emotions - Using the fast forward technique. I'm also going to set aside time for meditation every day, which has helped me become more calm in general in the past<br /> 4. Self-help reading material - In addition to studying this blog and MOMU, I also picked up a book called "If This is Love, Why do I Feel so Insecure?." It's about individuals who have a tendency to form insecure attachments in relationships, which I hope will help me to gain some insight into how I can avoid following the same relationship patterns in the future. I will let you know if it is helpful.<br /> 5. My personal appearance - already got a haircut and I've been working on getting a tan. Also working on clearing up my acne. I plan to go to the dentist for a cleaning soon and I'm going to whiten my teeth. I feel more confident when I feel I look good, and I also want to make sure that I look my best when we do eventually see each other again.<br /> 6. Keeping myself surrounded by supportive people - both on this forum and in real life. I talked to one of my old friends yesterday who got her ex back through not contacting him and just giving him space for awhile. And they just got engaged! So hearing success stories from people who have gone through similar situations really helps. </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/love4learning-no-contact-diary/page/3#post-25865 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 19:28:55 +0000 Petvet 25865@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Good article L4L! &lt;img src=&quot;http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_thumbup.gif&quot; title=&quot;:thumbup:&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> <p>Sincerely, Petvet. </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/jolyths-nc-diary/page/4#post-25864 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 17:40:12 +0000 MJ 25864@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Well, here we are on Day 11. </p> <p>Spent most of the day having my hair done and just pampering myself. The only problem with that is that he keeps creeping into my mind. And I kept telling myself "Oh for fuck's sake! He's JUST A GUY!" Christ! Why the hell can't I gt him out of my damn head?? Someone call the doctor and give this girl a lobotomy!</p> <p>Started writing again too. Hoping to just keep this dumb ass out of my head! I really need to let this go! My friends have been so great! All they keep saying is just wait till his married lover's husband finds out! Well, I know what will happen. He will blame ME! Don't know the husband, don't want to know the husband and sure in the hell would not tell him. I am not that type of person, but I know if he ever finds out then I will be the one to suffer the backlash. It's all good though because there is nothing, and I mean NOTHING, that he can do to hurt me anymore. He has played his last card. God and Karma never sleep. I will content myself with the fact that I did everything for him, I did nothing wrong and it is all on his head now. </p> <p>Henceforth, this is all about me. My life, my time, my remembering that I am a loving, caring person with a passion for life who never backs down from a challenge. There is someone out there who can keep up with me. </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/love4learning-no-contact-diary/page/3#post-25863 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 17:24:25 +0000 love4learning 25863@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p><strong><u>Day 28 - Life is Funny</u></strong></p> <p>We had beautiful weather today. My son's band received two superiors and one excellent for their large group performance evaluation. I was ecstatic! They did a really, really good job. I finally found a hostess dress for this upcoming wedding. And, I will be glad to have all that behind me as well. </p> <p>Ex texted me via his yahoo account because his number is blocked from my cell. Of course, I ignored it. His attempt to contact me didn't bother me so much this time. Probably because I have been really focused on my own evolution this week and really putting myself out there in life.</p> <p>I signed up for a Seafood 101 cooking class. Can hardly wait to attend on the 29th. I also signed my son up. It should be a blast. I am on my way out for a night at the comedy club then back home and early to bed so that I can get up before the break of dawn to volunteer for the ING marathon.</p> <p>I am posting a URL to a link for an article I found under the articles thread in <strong><u>our</strong></u> forum. It is well worth the read. Especially if you find yourself thinking about your ex a lot.</p> <p><a href="http://www.powerlawofattraction.com/forum/law-of-attraction-for-relationship/feeling-distance/?action=printpage">Feeling the Distance</a></p> <p><strong><u> Day 15 - No Compromise (Must Exercise) </u></strong><br /> My first day to goof off and not meet my goal. &lt;img src=&quot;http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_blink.gif&quot; title=&quot;:blink:&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/vs-nc-diary/page/3#post-25862 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 17:06:44 +0000 Vane23 25862@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Oh, and I have learned that this relationship is he in now is with the woman was seeing after he initially broke up with me the first time around. Seems he had broken up with her (or she with him, I don't know the story) then messed around with me in between (when I first started posting on here) then pulled some crap on me and now he's back with her. It all makes sense now. </p> <p>Roller coaster ride anyone? No thank you. I'm off the crazy train. Knowing all this makes it all that much easier for me to close that chapter of my life and move on. </p> <p>I have deleted him from all contact points and it will stay that way. I'm kicking this ass to the curb for good. No going back, only moving forward. I'm not sad, I'm not hurt, I'm not pissed, I'm just "done" wasting any more time on him for any reason. I deserve better. </p> <p>My lesson? Trust your gut, stay true to yourself and don't settle. I'm sure there is more to be learned from all this. I'm focused on continuing my personal evolution. </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/is-there-still-chances-of-him-getting-back-to-you-when-he-has-a-new-girlfriend#post-25861 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 17:02:43 +0000 marypoppins 25861@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Hi just a thought - if he is seeing someone - should you still try reconnecting with them? My ex has said he is seeing someone and that she doesnt want him seeing me? I'm wondering whether i need to try reconnecting another way, i.e email/text? </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/strengthnclaritys-break-up-story#post-25860 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 15:39:23 +0000 admin 25860@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p><center>Make a hole, we have another corpse on our hands! &lt;img src=&quot;http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_eek.gif&quot; title=&quot;8O&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; <br /> Now strengthnclarity's "old" dead relationship needs a proper burial, and a headstone of course!<br /> OK get a shovel and bury the past, from here on in it's a new day.<br /> **************************<br /> R.I.P.<br /> Here Lies<br /> strengthnclarity's Old Relationship<br /> 2.5 Years<br /> **************************<br /> This just means your "old" relationship is resting in peace, now it's time to work on giving birth (so to speak) to a stronger, better relationship having learned from the past, and not by living in it.</p> <p></center></p> <p>strengthnclarity Welcome to our forum!</p> <p>Now that you have shared your break up story, take the next step...</p> <p>Go to the forum home page and read the top posts (highlighted in blue) BEFORE you post anything else...this is mandatory, and follow the rules and steps in those posts...OK?</p> <p>Next...go and read the free plan, after you're familiar with the forum guidelines.</p> <p>Don't worry if your situation doesn't fit the plan exactly that is what our forum is for, it's a "think tank" that will help figure out the missing pieces of any plan...OK?</p> <p>YOU MUST BE READY TO FOLLOW THE FREE PLAN EXACTLY, AND SEND THE RECOMMENDED NC MESSAGE WORD FOR WORD.</p> <p>IF YOU'RE SCARED TO DO THIS AND WANT DEBATE ABOUT IT, PLEASE LEAVE, AND COME BACK WHEN YOU"RE READY.</p> <p>THIS FORUM IS NOT FOR DEBATING WHETHER YOU SHOULD OR SHOULD NOT FOLLOW THE FREE PLAN...WHY? </p> <p>IT WILL DRIVE THE OTHER MEMBERS, AND MYSELF CRAZY, AND BECAUSE IT HAS BEEN PROVEN TO WORK, IF YOU'RE NOT AFRAID TO USE IT CORRECTLY.</p> <p>Make sure you have read and completely understand our forum guidelines BEFORE you post anything else (if you have any questions about them PM me). Because I mean every word I wrote and you will get blocked if you refuse to follow them...understand? &lt;img src=&quot;http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_twisted.gif&quot; title=&quot;:twisted:&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> <p>Follow the rules...send the recommended NC message word for word...follow the plan...get your life and hopefully your ex back again...deal? &lt;img src=&quot;http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_cool.gif&quot; title=&quot;8)&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> <p>P.S. The people who have evolved the fastest, and progressed the most are the people who have been very active in our forum. I suggest once you get your evolution started that you do the same, and experience the same magic they did. </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/denillas-nc-diary#post-25859 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 15:19:21 +0000 DenillaD 25859@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Im on day 20 of NC. Being away has really helped me during this process. Im feeling so much better about not having the constant contact but at times I still wonder if thinks of me. This is my second day back and i think being home makes me think about him more. He sent a few texts and 2 voicemails to see if i was ok and he asked if i found someone new. Atleast i know there is some thoughts in his mind. On march 8, i went on a nice date and my fortune cookie read " Someone from past that you care about seeks reconciliation" . I really had a nice evening but i couldnt help but hope that might be the case in the near future. I know i still love him and hope that we will reconnect in the future. Stay strong everyone cause this is a hard but necessary journey. </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/inkymandalas-nc-diary/page/2#post-25858 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 14:43:42 +0000 love4learning 25858@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Hi Inky, I see polite and impersonal as how you are when you first meet someone. Think back to when you guys first met, I will assume you were polite and impersonal. And, I would bet my paycheck that you were definitely lighthearted and fun. I don't have the ebook. But, from MOMU I get the impression that the first few interactions should be polite, short, and impersonal. Kind of like if you were touching base with a distant relative and you didn't want to hold them but just let them know you were thinking about them.</p> <p>Or, another scenario would be if you called a dear friend and a family member answered the phone that you don't really have a true relationship with, you would be cordial and to the point. Just my take on it. Hope this is in line with what you were looking for. Keep Up the good work! </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/sws-nc-diary/page/14#post-25857 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 14:30:20 +0000 admin 25857@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <blockquote><p><cite>KC <a href="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/sws-nc-diary/page/14#post-25853">said</a>:</cite><br /> that's when I realised that I need to move away from all of them. Sad part is my ex is a part of this very fucked up group. He may not have reached that level of a fuck up but they say u tend to mirror the company u keep.</p> </blockquote> <p>He is a part of that group "at the moment", people are always changing (sometimes for the better, and sometimes for the worst), but things are always changing.</p> <p>Don't corner yourself into believing that things will always be the way they are...they won't, they can't be...nothing stays the same.</p> <p>The people you see that "never" change, well they work their asses off to be that way...it is hard fucking work to keep yourself from evolving.</p> <p>The problem is after putting up this masquerade for so long, they become too afraid to change.</p> <p>The younger people are, the more chance they have of changing, so there is always hope for your ex, but that is his problem, not yours.</p> <p>It is like the airlines tell you..."In-case of emergency put YOUR oxygen mask on first, and then help others around you"...why?</p> <p>Let's face it, you are not gong to be any good to ANYONE passed out, or dead, on the floor...you must save yourself first, and then worry about others later.</p> <p>This is just one of the many creeds I live my life by, and it works...it really does.</p> <p>Whoever said that is being "selfish" is another example of the stiff lipped, tight-assed, morally and emotionally bankrupt clones, that are afraid to evolve.</p> <p>Don't listen to them, help yourself first, and then try to help them later, if they even want to be helped.</p> <p>I have found most people would like to change you over to their point of view then drop the facade, and admit they were wrong.</p> <p>I am not religious, but there is one saying that I like, and that is "God helps those who help themselves." </p> <p>I truly believe that, and it is another one of my creeds that I live by.</p> <p>Read my NC Diary, and see how I helped myself...no one else did it, I did, and you, and everyone else, can accomplish the very same thing.</p> <p>You can create your very own miracle, the powers of the universe, God or whatever you call them, are only waiting for you to make the first move, and that's all it takes.</p> <blockquote><p><cite>KC <a href="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/sws-nc-diary/page/14#post-25853">said</a>:</cite><br /> Until then life is trial and error and one step at a time</p> </blockquote> <p>That is true for each and everyone one of us, life has always pretty much been trial and error, there are no exceptions.</p> <p>How else would we find our true places in this life, this world...universe?</p> <p>The key is to learn from your mistakes, not repeat them, or spend your life regretting them, learn from them, and then move on.</p> <p>Stay Strong KC (and everyone else too)! &lt;img src=&quot;http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_rambo.gif&quot; title=&quot;:rambo:&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/lizzie-bees-no-contact-diary/page/2#post-25856 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 14:15:46 +0000 marypoppins 25856@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Hey Lizzie, maybe its the stars or something but i'm missing my ex today lots as well &lt;img src=&quot;http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_sad.gif&quot; title=&quot;:-(&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; - must not break NC though!!</p> <p>I wouldnt think he didn't love you. I wonder how my ex could suddenly not love me, when nothing really happened to make him fall out of love with me, but i think its just the male thinking. He prob does but just is trying to deny it, to try make his life better in his eyes, but eventually will realise he still does. Keep your chin up, keep to NC, its the only way forward. </p> <p>When i broke Nc and spoke to mine, he said he thinks he still loves me and is confused and is missing me - to me hes messed up and prob does but only through NC will he realise - whether i'm still there at the end of it, is another thing! </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/lizzie-bees-no-contact-diary/page/2#post-25855 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 13:38:49 +0000 lizzie-bee 25855@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Today has been really hard. Don't know why but have missed him so much today. Kept myself busy though, have spent all day cleaning ready for when I give up smoking. Am trying to stay as happy and positive as possible but today has been a down day. Maybe its the sad realisation that even though I loved him he couldn't really of loved me otherwise he'd of said he did and he'd still be here.<br /> I'm not going to break no contact, no matter how much I want to speak to him I won't do that because it'll ruin the only chance I've got and also it'll upset me. I need to be strong!!!! </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/loveconquersall-no-contact-diary/page/4#post-25854 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 13:15:11 +0000 LoveConquersAll 25854@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Hello Forum.</p> <p>Thought I'd let everyone know that I am still here alive and well.</p> <p>I decided to go back to school for my Masters in Accounting and I start classes in about two weeks. Expecting a bonus by April 1st. Almost had an interview...at least they called to check my references and now it's just a matter of time before I land a decent job. </p> <p>Got even more involved in the church...teaching 5th grade Sunday school and I am a team leader for youth ages 13-17. The new guy well he's still hanging in there...tried to get rid of him again...told him not looking for anything and I won't fall for him because of his situation and what I don't want is to hurt someone the way I have been hurt...so we need to keep it light. We plan to buy bowling balls and go bowling more often...we shot pool once and went bowling once...supposed to try the movie thing again Sunday right after church.</p> <p>I have plenty going on these days...life is really good...I will be a grandmother a second time in October...my finances are getting stronger and I see that light at the end of the tunnel. Easter at my house, graduation party at my house for my step-daughter, fishing is right around the corner...To all who read this pray that my bonus is at least $3k. That will be the icing on the cake. </p> <p>More soon...still staying strong.</p> <p>-LCA </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/sws-nc-diary/page/14#post-25853 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 12:48:44 +0000 KC 25853@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Lol Scott I haven't understood the tatoo for love concept too. That post made me laugh. And really I didn't know engagement rings were such a messy thing in the States. Btw I tried socialising a bit during this whole mess and guess what? I discovered I was better on my own. There are so many messed up people out there who are pretending how great they are or how right they are. I came pretty close to compromising a lifelong rule of mine yesterday and that's when I realised that I need to move away from all of them. Sad part is my ex is a part of this very fucked up group. He may not have reached that level of a fuck up but they say u tend to mirror the company u keep. You were right in your last reply to me that its better to stay the hell away from insanity. Well if only you could have telepathy about people. Until then life is trial and error and one step at a time &lt;img src=&quot;http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif&quot; title=&quot;:-)&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; I hope I shall learn all my lessons carefully and file them away for future. </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/sambullingtons-nc-diary#post-25852 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 12:35:52 +0000 admin 25852@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <blockquote><p><cite>SamBullington <a href="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/sambullingtons-nc-diary#post-25834">said</a>:</cite><br /> I have found that my pride comes in handy when dealing with my emotions, because I see it as a weakness to cry or get emotional in public. </p></blockquote> <p>It is not so much a weakness, as a waste of time.</p> <p>Your break up is a wound, and you need to dress it, and let it heal, if you just sit there crying over the pain, it continues to bleed, and will NEVER heal.</p> <p>There is a time for tears, and a time for strength, this is the time for strength.</p> <p>You can cry later if you think it will help, but first you must focus on your personal evolution if you want to survive this, OK?</p> <p>Me, I have found that a bucket of positive results means much more to me than a bucket of tears.</p> <p>Everyone can control their own destiny, don't ever let yourself think differently, you would only be kidding yourself.</p> <p>It's all about free will, and what you choose to do...victim or victor..what's it going to be? &lt;img src=&quot;http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_cool.gif&quot; title=&quot;8)&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> <p>Stay Strong! &lt;img src=&quot;http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_rambo.gif&quot; title=&quot;:rambo:&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/sambullingtons-nc-diary#post-25851 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 12:14:30 +0000 SamBullington 25851@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>I did delete him. From myspace, messenger, as well as my phone. I also told my friend who informed me of the status to not mention anything he does or posts.</p> <p>Thank you very much. =) </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/the-ring#post-25850 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 12:10:20 +0000 admin 25850@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>As much fun as this was (NOT!) I booted whiny boy's ass, so we can close this lame-ass topic as well. &lt;img src=&quot;http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_thumbup.gif&quot; title=&quot;:thumbup:&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/my-no-contact-diary-9/page/2#post-25849 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 12:08:16 +0000 admin 25849@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <blockquote><p><cite>Dave <a href="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/my-no-contact-diary-9/page/2#post-25843">said</a>:</cite><br /> Someone..anyone...talk me off the ledge?</p> </blockquote> <p>How about if I push you off the fucking ledge, and save you from trying to find enough "guts" to jump? &lt;img src=&quot;http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_twisted.gif&quot; title=&quot;:twisted:&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> <p>This is NOT what I had in mind when I set this up, a place for "panicky pussies" to act out because they want attention. &lt;img src=&quot;http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_banghead.gif&quot; title=&quot;:banghead:&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> <p>There are plenty of forums out there that welcome this kind of shit...not here.</p> <p>Now that you can't splatter our forum with your worthless babble, you can spend more time Googling no contact and confusing yourself even more. &lt;img src=&quot;http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_willy_nilly.gif&quot; title=&quot;:willynilly:&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> <p>This place is for "Ass Kickers" not ass kissers.</p> <p>My last piece of advice would be to keep reading our forum, and learn from watching real "ass kickers" fight to get their lives, and their ex's (if they still want them) back again.</p> <p>Buh-bye &lt;img src=&quot;http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_wave.gif&quot; title=&quot;:wave:&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/beautys-nc-diary/page/3#post-25848 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 12:08:09 +0000 Purek 25848@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Hey Beauty..If someone really loves you, religion doesn't matter. My last BF is atheist, I'm christian and he would sometimes come to church with me. One day I asked him why he came b/c he didn't have to and he said "because its important to you." Either way, to me it wouldn't matter if he went or not. But b/c he loved me and tolerated my faith, it showed that he really cared for me.<br /> Religion is a cheap excuse for alot of things (and this coming from a born-again christian!). The one thing about real love is that its unconditional and they accept you the way you are and visa versa. </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/pureks-nc-diary/page/2#post-25847 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 12:00:07 +0000 Purek 25847@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Day 73 WTF? So my monday date totally flaked on me, so that's tha last I'll be contacting him. My ex-fiance is crazy! One wknd he's threatening to commit suicide and then the next, he's offering me money to have sex with him! He has def not had his evolution, even though its been almost 3 years. I feel really happy now where I am. I like being single and doing whatever I want. I do miss my ex (the one I started this process for) but I've realized that he is not the one. Things have been going well for me and my lover. He's the one I've wanted to be with for the last 3 years. He tells me he loves me and that waking up next to me feels right. We are both not ready for a relationship now. I'm enjoying my independence and my new career opportunities. </p> <p>So for everyone in NC (as I am): you may come to a place in your evolution where you finally matter more than your ex. Its a very happy and complete place to be. I'm not going to get back with my ex but for those of you who still want to, it is a process and the slower, the better! Stay strong everyone! </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/beths-nc-diary#post-25846 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 11:51:47 +0000 Bethany 25846@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Well so far today has gone really well. Had a really good day with my little girl anddone a bit of retail therapy. I am just about to jump in the bath and get ready for a good night out!! NC at all today he hasnt contacted me so i havent had to speak to him at all &lt;img src=&quot;http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_biggrin.gif&quot; title=&quot;:D&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/leafys-no-contact-diary#post-25845 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 11:17:31 +0000 positive 25845@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>If you think you won't get hurt when he didn't reply you or repied you but said he didn't want to talk to you due to his current gf, that means you are ready. Otherwise you'd better wait until you are really ready. </p> <p>Stay strong </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/my-no-contact-diary-9/page/2#post-25844 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 11:17:02 +0000 jj 25844@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>You're in a vulnerable emotional state. Now is not a good time to have any contact with your ex, who may try to manipulate you in ways that are not in your best interests. Now is also not a good time to read random stuff on the internet on how to get your ex back. While you might learn something, you can learn it later, and there are a lot of opinions on the subject that are not necessarily good for you emotionally.</p> <p>Now is a time to surround yourself with people you trust. Family, friends, etc. People who have your best interests in mind. </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/my-no-contact-diary-9/page/2#post-25843 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 11:00:51 +0000 Dave 25843@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Ok...made it through yesterday. Woke up this morning feeling good. Did some chores around the house and it looks good. Then I went online. It seems that the only thing that I do now a days is look for the answer to this. I know it will past but for some strange reason I feel that googling every "...how to get your ex back..." or "...does no contact work..." sometimes help. HOWEVER today when I did these searches I found stuff like:</p> <p>"...no contact only leads to more silence..."<br /> "...she will think that you are just mad at her..."<br /> "...no contact only helps you, not to help getting your ex back..."<br /> "...makes your ex feel better you moved on.."</p> <p>So now I am feeling a little bit panicked. Someone..anyone...talk me off the ledge? </p> http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/vs-nc-diary/page/3#post-25842 Sat, 20 Mar 2010 10:59:17 +0000 Vane23 25842@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ <p>Just an update for my diary friends here. I'm moving on from this old relationship. It's broken and I don't think we can move forward at all. I'm better off just moving on completely. I've been going out, meeting new people (guys included!) and having a good time. </p> <p>Distance from him is good and is allowing me to put him and the old relationship in perspective. While he is in another relationship now (very much broadcasted that to the entire world on FB recently) I find his actions strange with me. He is hesitant to see me because he feels "awkward" (really? If he truly just considered me a friend, then why would it be awkward?) And the other week he asked if I was "angry" with him- which I also thought was strange. That literally came out of nowhere. I didn't answer his im. Just said I was busy in a meeting and couldn't talk (which was true.)</p> <p>So, I've distanced myself from him in a big way (no contact at all) and will remain distant. I realize that we really can't be friends- even if I wanted to be at this point. And it can't be anything else, so what's the point? Other than to move on... </p> <p>I read recently somewhere that if someone isn't adding to your life, the are subtracting from it. And if they aren't multiplying you, they are dividing you. Those words I think are very true. </p> <p>Hope you all are well! </p>