How to Kick Loves Ass - Break Up Help Forum

How to Kick Loves Ass - Break Up Help Forum » Recent Topics http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Free Break up Help, Relationship Advice, and Plan to Get Your Ex Back en-US Wed, 10 Mar 2010 15:18:13 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 <![CDATA[Search]]> q http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/search.php carlylewislewis on "my no contact diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/my-no-contact-diary-11#post-24928 Wed, 10 Mar 2010 06:58:36 +0000 carlylewislewis 24928@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Hi people!! I have just joined and posted my story in the other forum. Last monday i sent my no contact letter exactly as shown on this website. It was so hard to do because i have never been without contact with him. I have to do this because i cant go on the way im going. I have to do this to get myself on my feet again. 24 hrs later I received an email from the ex saying that our life would have been wonderful if we were both still in love. He said that he knows how much i love him but it has to be both ways and he cant get back what he had. He also said he honestly misses my company but the love life has died. He said its better that we dont keep in contact for the time being as he wants me to get over him emotionaly( how nice of him!!!)He said that maybe in a few months we can meet and sit and talk about life in general. He said he directed all his post to his new address. Told me to take care. He went to london for 5 days just to get away from everything and he wanted time with his friends. He is due to move to italy on the 7th April to take up a new job. I was devasted getting that, its as if he is really happy with everything. I have kept my cool and didint respond. Even though i started to right out a text doing the begging thing i would normally do. I didnt and i felt better. I feel that if i replied i would be waiting constantly for a reply back. Anyway a week has passed with no contact, i have been back to the gymn, and generally trying to keep myself busy, night times are the hardest. Its good to have caring friends and family but no one sees what happens when you come home and close that door hey. Today i received a text off him. It asked if i was ok? and that he was staying in London until the end of the month. He will come back to our home town for few days before he goes to italy. He said he hoped we can meet up if i like. He ended it with a x which he hasnt done for weeks I just feel so confussed now. He said before that it would be better not to contact each other because of the way i get upset and yet hes prepared to put me through that again one last time before he goes. Ive decided there is no way on earth i can meet him in 3 weeks because he will be off and i will be back to square one again. I havent replied to his text, did i do the right thing there? Is he starting to miss me? or has he really moved on that he just sees me as a friend and wants closure. I feel good i havent replied although i have to keep stopping myself. I am hoping that he may text me again as i havent text him back any feed back would be helpful because im so confussed Daniel on "Daniel's LDR NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/daniels-ldr-nc-diary-1#post-22009 Sun, 14 Feb 2010 13:48:09 +0000 Daniel 22009@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Yesterday I cleared all the stuff I got from her out of my room and stored it away. That was a neccesary step for me I think because it gave a finality to everything. I sent her the NC message this morning and it made me feel a lot better. Today we were at a friends place and when I was at the toilet it hit me and I did the fast forward technique. After doing it for a while I thought: "Fu*k, why are you worrying and crying? She decided to dump you, she should be the one to cry. Go on and live your life." I think that was a major step too. Tomorrow I'm going to go into NC with her parents, which is really hard for me because they have become very close and I actually think of them as my best friends. Something deep inside me tells me that I need distance with them so that I can gain distance with my ex however. It is really hard for me to be alone - even if it's only for a few hours - not because I would be thinking about her all the time, but simply because I'm bored and don't know what to do with myself. Anyone experienced this too and can give me some tips on what to do about it? Any good book recommendations? Thanks everyone for your help. carlylewislewis on "my story" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/my-story-9#post-24926 Wed, 10 Mar 2010 06:43:14 +0000 carlylewislewis 24926@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Hi guys, what a great website. Sometimes its easier to speak to people you dont know than your nearest and dearest. Here is my story. I met a wonderful guy 3 and half years ago. We married 6 months later and were so in love. I have never ever felt love like this in my life, we were so devoted to each other. We had so many plans for our life ahead, such wonderful plans. Then my jealousy set in. I was convinced that he was up to things, being unfaithful and not being able to understand how someone so wonderful could be so real. I would check his phone constantly, question him on the odd occassion he went out at night and convince myself that he was with another girl. I knew all along that i was killing the relationship but i couldnt stop myself. For all those that have issues with jealousy you will understand how it takes over your rational thinking. It all came to ahead christmas day this year when he was texting constantly at the dinner table, later thatevening i checked his phone and found out he was texting some girl from work. Although it was innocent texts i couldnt control myself. I threw the phone at him and went into a rage. It was then he said it was over. That he couldnt go on living like this, that for the last 6 months he had falen out of love with me because of all this. He said his love for me had died and he cant get back what he had. He said that the attraction and passion had gone. I was devasted. I did all the wrong things like try to convince him that we could get help, constantly crying, begging etc. In the mean time he was offered a job in italy which he has accepted so this was like a timbbomb ticking away for me knowing that onthe 7th april he would be leaving forever. He stayed for another 6 weeks, but this made him depressed. He moved out to rent a room. I would call him crying and he would come over, the odd occassion he would stay just to comfort me. Then one night he said he couldnt keep doing this and it would be better if we didint have any contact. He called me to say he was going to london for a few days wich is 300 miles away to stay with friends even though he has always said he hated london when he lived there and never wanted to go back to the way of life of 1 night stand and drugs etc. This really upset me to think he could be going back to that. I have decided to follow the plan on this site because not only have i got nothing to lose but i need the no contact to get myself on my feet, and get me out of this low i am in. I am also getting counselling for my jealousy which i hope will help me in the future live_laughlove on "My No Contact Diary :)" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/my-no-contact-diary-10#post-24757 Mon, 08 Mar 2010 16:57:18 +0000 live_laughlove 24757@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ i sent my no contact message about 3 weeks ago, but have only just joined the forum. i attempted my own no contact (i didnt even send a message, i just stopped talking) when i hadn't find this site and it didn't work. i found this site, and sent the recommended message, and im proud to say im on week 3 now and have yet to break it <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> i've completely lost count of the days, but im sure its been about 3 weeks. why should i count them? when i feel ready to reconnect, then i will. it's all about me now, not my ex boyfriend. its time to get my life back <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> dolly109 on "Dolly's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/dollys-nc-has-already-been-7-days#post-19841 Sun, 17 Jan 2010 10:37:13 +0000 dolly109 19841@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ So I just posted my break up story and I post my N.C diary. I had issues with registering at first so strated my n.c without this forum but I must say Scott has been supporting me as I have private messaged him a couple of times to help me in my moments of weakness whilst trying to sort my login details. So here I am. After being in contact lots just over a week ago I realised I wasn't helping myself and that I was always hoping he would come back. But with I was only being unfare to myself as I was always hoping he would change his mind and come back. I didn't work on me... SO i sent out the n.c note last Sunday night. on monday just gone I got an email from him it said: "that came as a bolt from the blue but I support you in whatever you think is right. I won't contact you further but will be thinking of you of course. Thanks for all your honesty." I didn't reply - well done me!! Half an hour later I got a text message from him saying: That he got my note and that I sounded thoughtful and that he hoped I was OK. I said he was really sad right now much like me and that he was just getting by. He said he wouldn't call but wanted to send his love. He said that he knows it isn't much after what he has put me through but that he does care very much how I am getting on. He said he would always be there if I need to talk" I didn't respond. He then called that night...I didn't pick up the call. He left a voicemail saying that he knew he shouldn't call but he wanted to understand why I was not wanting to talk and that he would call and explain if I had asked the same of him. I didn't reply... He then emailed me on Wednesday saying that he wasn't expecting me to stop talking to him like this. that he respects my wishes but more importantly he is worried that i am are ok. He said he will always have deep feelings for me and cant' turn them off simply because I ask for no contact. And that his point being that he's worried for me as it's not like mr to switch off completely without warning. and that he hope/pray I am ok. Love Him I didn't reply That is is I had no more contact, then on Friday I updated my profile on facebook saying that my thoughts were of my mum that day as it had been 8 years since she passed away and how much had happened in my life in that time. He then emailed me to say he was thinking of me that day. But didn't leave any kisses on the message and that is all he wrote. Since then nothing. So I have so far managed seven days - it feels like a life time. I can read from his emails that he is only caring and not telling me he still loves me so I am telling myself to move on. BUt deep in my heart I want to be with him so much. I have been working really hard to get my old self back - and it is working - I am being cheeky, smiling and going out and having fun. I have slipped up a couple of times in front of mutual friends and got upset and cried but have told them I am strong and will get through this. So here is my story and my n.c. diary so far. I look forward to sharing our experiences and hopefully find a buddy to support each other. Thank you for taking the time to read my diary so far, I am a good listener and pretty good at support and advice just not so good at taking my own <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> I suppose there is part of me that is hoping that he hasn't just said whatever to my n.c message that there might be hope but I also wonder if that is because he just loves me as a friend and honours what we had but doesn't want it back?? He is online dating but I am not going to let that break n.c as I have realised that even if we were communicating he would still be dating. I do worry though that he will forget me and move on during my n.c. and that when I am ready to reconnect he won't want to know me, care or meet up. But I guess that is the risk we all take... Petvet on "Petvet's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/petvets-nc-diary#post-21329 Fri, 05 Feb 2010 12:58:18 +0000 Petvet 21329@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Please read my break up story I just posted for a more detailed background. We dated for 6 years in high school and college, and have kept in touch over the last 35 years off and on. I've never lost my feelings for him after all these years, and I don't think he's lost his feelings for me (he named his daughter after me!). He's still married but has lived in separate states across the country from his wife for past three years. Apparently their marriage is not in good shape, but staying legally married due to economy, house is upside down etc. We were in LDR contact from Sept-Dec and I went to see him in Dec. It was the most beautiful time I've ever had. He said we were going to keep seeing each other. He called Dec. 8th and I haven't heard from him since then! No idea why. I've been sick with grief and worry. Today I sent him the No Contact letter, but worded it a little differently due to our LOONNGG relationship. I told him I assumed he got back together with his wife, or may have found a new girlfriend out west, but whatever the reason it was OK and I want him to be happy and fulfilled in his life and be with a partner who loves him and appreciates him. I told him I have to move on and let go too, and I wished him all the best. I am so sad, I feel like I lost my best friend (certainly my oldest friend) and have no idea why. I've never stopped loving him in 35 years and having a very rough time, even after 30 days of NC. PS I'm not in a relationship with anyone right now and haven't been for about 9 months. PSS I have also bought and read Magic of Making Up. Jolyth on "Jolyth's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/jolyths-nc-diary#post-24146 Mon, 01 Mar 2010 09:43:16 +0000 Jolyth 24146@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ So, I am already on Day 3 of NC and man does it bite! We used to talk and text several times a day and now I am like "What am I supposed to do with my spare time now??" Ah well, maybe I can get some work done! LOL! I think my biggest fear is the Myth that Scott debunked about them not contacting you and moving on with their lives. I mean, in my situation, I have no clue what the heck is going on. Are we together, are we not, are we talking a break? This sitting on the fence truly bites. I know I was always available for him and started to lose sight of me. I even blew off my friends, which are his friends too. I actually did TOO much for him. It was no longer him and me as a couple, but it became all about his wants and needs and while I am a compassionate person, eventually it was going to fall apart because I have wants and needs too. I am a rational person, who can be a little too in touch with her emotions. "Passionate and Intense" my sorta bf called me. "Throw my all into everything" I call it. Whatever. Difference of opinion. But still, as rational as I can be, I have been going around with my phone crazy glued to my hand. Yesterday I finally set the annoying little gadget in my purse and ignored it till this morning. I walk away and leave it on my desk. I hate him being able to control me via electronics. I deleted him our of the phone and off my contact list. I do not need to be reminded of the fact that he is not contacting me while I am trying to rediscover the strong minded and independant woman that attracted and made him have to have me in the first place. Still, not talking to him makes me feel empty, so I talk to others. I thought about drafting texts to him but not sending them, but since I removed his number it now takes too much effort to type in the number. Now if I could just remove the number from my memory with a spork, it would all be good. Ugh. Hope I am not sounding like a whiner here. Trying to keep my spirits up and blab all the thoughts in my head. Shaan on "Shaan's shannanigans" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/shaans-shannanigans#post-24736 Mon, 08 Mar 2010 13:54:10 +0000 Shaan 24736@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Hey. Posted NC message. There you go, in your inbox. Don;t think i'll here from him as i havn't since break up in Jan...but feels good that he knows i'm not crying over him! Which..i'm not! I want to be a better person for myself, and if not for him, for anyone else that enters in my life. marypoppins on "MaryPoppins NC Control Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/marypoppins-nc-control-diary#post-20513 Tue, 26 Jan 2010 16:11:38 +0000 marypoppins 20513@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Hi all. My ex and I broke up officially at the beggining of Jan, however in his eyes its was at the beggining of Dec, however during that time I asked him to think about it and we regulary spent time together including Christmas. We offically ended the relationship at the beggining of Jan, however as he has a past of depression I have stayed in contact to look out for him, as i'm worried he has it again. Anyway 5 days ago we met as he said he didn't want to hear from me anymore and had started dating again. I sent him a goodbye email 4 days ago and haven't text him since, however since finding this website I did send him the NC message last night - so this is now 1 day on. We have been together on and off for the past 4 years, however for the past 2 years, have been so close, talking about marriage and forever. His grandad died at the beggining of Dec, and the split came as such a surprize that I wonder if this is related. Anyway I love him so much and would do everything I could for him. He always said i was too good for him and that hes doing this split so that maybe one day in the future we can be together and have a good future. I'm just not sure I can wait that long (hes saying, a year at least) so trying this to sort my head and try and get him back. love4learning on "Love4Learning - No Contact Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/love4learning-no-contact-diary#post-22206 Mon, 15 Feb 2010 22:17:44 +0000 love4learning 22206@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Day 2 - This is day 2 of no contact after making a commitment on this webpage. However, tomorrow will complete 14 days of no contact. It has really been challenging for me, considering I work with my ex. Not to mention, my his office is right down the hall from mine and I could see every person as they entered or left his office. Therefore, I moved the furniture around in my office so that I didn't have to see him. And, go the opposite way to avoid passing by his office. And, I am determined to stick with the plan because I suspect all of this time he has been seeing me and someone else in our office, possibly another lady as well. I will continue to remind myself that I deserve more from a relationship and that I need to love myself enough not to settle. I also created my "No Contact Journal" as prescribed by the plan. Now, I just need to focus on not discussing my ex as well. Well, off to write in my journal. Today was a good day. Celina on "Celina's NC diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/celinas-nc-diary#post-22994 Mon, 22 Feb 2010 02:24:36 +0000 Celina 22994@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Today is the fifth day:( And I miss him so much, I need so much control to not look at him in school or sms him (I even deleted his number to prevent myself frm smsing him, I rmb his number tho) I got so angry when I heard other girls discussing about him, they are eyeing on my guy:( and I am so afraid of losing him. But then I told myself then if I want him back, I have to control my emotions and that what they are discussing shows they are not close to my ex, they know nth much about him, unlike me. I am the one for him. I really hope he can realise that asap. I am intending to give him his v day present on the 14th day of NC. The sketchbook is full of drawings and pictures and writings about us and his dreams. I really hope he is missing me:( I have to be strong. anna_a on "Help - He says he misses me in his life!" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/help-he-says-he-misses-me-in-his-life#post-1656 Wed, 10 Jun 2009 20:04:53 +0000 anna_a 1656@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I am hoping for a little advice or some big advice!! My ex an I broke up about 6 weeks ago. I am 38, he is 30. We broke up on good terms although the break up was because I could see myself having children with him, but he didn't know. I had never ever had a conversation like this sort with any other boyfriend in the past. At the time of the "kids talk", I got emotional, and thought it was a sign that he didn't love me. Of course I was wrong, because he told me that he did love me, but I panicked and he panicked (I thought he didn't love me, and he just felt "pressure"). But also at the time of the break up, we were both in shock I think, and we decided that it was too confusing to work out, and we couldn't see a future in it all. Two weeks ago, I told my ex that it was a good decision that we had broke up. I didn't believe that it was, but I wanted to agree with the decision. Last night my ex (who I love dearly and definitely want back but haven't told him), told me that he: "misses me being in his life", and he was very flirty and cheeky. I was really surprised to hear his heart speak so openly and fondly, and I was trying to understand what he wanted from me, but I couldn't work it out. I didn't know if he wanted me back, and he also said: "I miss everything", "it's great that we are in each other's lives, its just how and at what level are the hard ones to figure out". I was a little confused but tried to keep everything "light", so I said, "yes, but we are still in each others lives, as friends", to which he replied "yes, that's great". I was so stuck for words. I dearly wanted to tell him how I felt, that I wanted him back forever, but I couldn't - something stopped me - and I think that 'something' was that I couldn't quite understand if he ACTUALLY wants me back. He also said... at the time of the break up all he wanted to do was just drive over to my house unannounced and make up. I actually had the same vision, and remember watching out my window for him at the time! He has contacted me three times over the last three days, which also makes me think a lot about him. I aslo said last night: "if we are trying to move on, the long and frequent contacts aren't helping, but then I don't know, I am going to act with my heart from now on". And he agreed, that from his heart, he would like to keep contacting me. All signs, I know, point to positive, but I really want to take it a bit slow too - because : 1/ I dont know if he REALLY wants me back 2/ I cried almost every day since we broke up because I love him so much (but I never tell anyone that this is how I feel or never tell anyone that I cry every day) I just want to do the "right" things now to bring him back! Help please, he is the best boyfriend I have ever had, and I know that we loved each other dearly once, it was the real thing, the right thing and the most amazing relationship. Thank you Rosie on "Rosie's Get a life diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/rosies-get-a-life-diary#post-23304 Tue, 23 Feb 2010 13:20:44 +0000 Rosie 23304@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I tried over 15 months ago to initiate no contact with my ex and guess what, I did absolutely everything I shouldn't have done, not only that through this process of pathetic, out of character behaviour I feel I have lost part of myself, do whilst I would like to get my ex back, I'd like to do it on my terms and spend the time working on myself. I decided on Sunday night that I wouldn't contact my ex again. Monday I wrote the NC letter and today I have mailed it out. I have had no contact with my ex for 2 days and already I feel I am getting back into my life. I had so many projects left on hold because I was obsessing about this man all the time. Even after two days of no texts I feel like I am getting my own life. I don't feel like dating yet, but I have arranged for my girlfriends to come over for lunch tomorrow and next Thursday and I plan to take a look at all the hobbies I have put off and all the places I would like to visit and schedule them into my life. I have turned off my personal mobile off! I am just looking at my phone twice a day..hey...I am not waiting for calls and texts. I am getting a life. If a friend dies..they have my work number :lol:, the crash team know where I am!! :P. Since I have done so many things wrong with my ex and he too..then I think this NC should last at least 6 months even a year. It has been hard today not picking up the phone to chat about this and that, hey..I think I have a few other friends I can call!!! Tomorrow is my birthday and on Sunday is his...that will be a challenge, but I am not replying to any texts or calls and I am not sending any greetings for is. NC means NC!! silverwolf9 on "Silverwolf9's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/silverwolf9s-nc-diary#post-24901 Tue, 09 Mar 2010 21:03:27 +0000 silverwolf9 24901@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ So I sent the no contact message today. I wish I had done it sooner. My ex and I broke up almost a month ago and he has done nothing but send me mixed signals ever since. He says he still loves me, thinks about me all the time, and misses me more than I could know. He has been texting me almost every day since the breakup. But he still says he is afraid to get back together because he doesn’t want to fall into the same old arguments and us end up unhappy again. He said he just doesn’t want to date me or anyone else “right now.” He said that he needs time but still wants to be friends and take it day by day. We even met for lunch over the weekend and he kissed me afterward. But he is still not ready to get back together. So all these mixed signals have done nothing but make me really confused and make it harder for me to move to a place where I can gain emotional control. So I finally decided today that I am not getting anywhere and that no contact really is the best way to get past all this confusion. I sent him the NC message, and this was his response (with names removed): "Ok (my name), ill respect your choice just as I respect you. I do love you still, please believe me. Be safe and take care… you and (my daughter’s name) <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> " I am not really sure how to feel about his response… he is still sending me the same old mixed signals and I don’t know what to think. This is going to be very hard… admin on "Inspirational Articles and Stories" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/inspirational-articles-and-stories#post-13452 Fri, 13 Nov 2009 11:25:19 +0000 admin 13452@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Hi forum members, I figured since we are starting to get a lot of members sharing articles, and stories they have found that we need a topic for all of them. So if you spot a good story or article in another post on our forum...PM me so I can move it here, or you can copy/paste it yourself (just watch for duplicates, OK?). Just quote the whole article, and then copy everything in the Post box, and paste it into the post box under the new topic (see first post below). From now on I ask everyone to post their new articles, and stories under this one topic so it is easy for every member to find them in their time of need...make sense? Keep the stories coming...they really are a big help, and I appreciate your support of our forum. Thanks! <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":-)" class="bb_smilies" /> KC on "KC's NC" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/kcs-nc#post-15013 Sat, 28 Nov 2009 13:06:51 +0000 KC 15013@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Been a week now. Holding out quite ok. First few days were very difficult with me looking at the phone each time it rang expecting it could be him. Not in that stage anymore, but at times feel angry at him for not making contact, I know its early and I hope to soon get over even this anger. Making new friends and started flirting a bit. I do still hope to get back but I tell myself that if it has to work out it will. What sometimes gives me strength is that I have done all the texting, emailing everything possible, so now not more that I can do there. So NC is the best course I tell myself when I feel low. I realise I was a much fun person early on in the relationship and somewhere I lost that along the way and became too emotional. I want that fun person back, coz thats the person people fall in love with isnt it? silverwolf9 on "Silverwolf9's Break Up Story" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/silverwolf9s-break-up-story#post-24876 Tue, 09 Mar 2010 18:12:17 +0000 silverwolf9 24876@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ My ex-boyfriend and I were together for about 6 months, which doesn’t seem like long but we were both very happy and in love with each other through most of that time. He is by far the best relationship I have ever been in. He was very good to me, very affectionate, and great with my 4-year old daughter. Unfortunately, I was physically and emotionally abused for seven years by my ex-husband who I finally left about 1 ½ years ago. This left me with a lot of issues with insecurity. Toward the end of my relationship with my ex-boyfriend, I started getting very insecure because I kept telling myself that my relationship with him was too good to be true and that I didn’t deserve it and it wouldn’t last. I started getting too needy of affirmations from him that he thought I was pretty. He has a lot of female friends who are very attractive, and I started to get very jealous of them even though he was always honest to me about them and would assure me that I was the one he wanted, not them. During the last month of our relationship I started arguing with him frequently about his friends. He started wanting to spend less and less time with me, which just made me feel more insecure. He started to get angry more often as well, which really bothered him. He broke up with me about a month ago. He told me that he just wasn’t happy in our relationship any more. He said that he still loved me, he just needs some time and we can’t be together right now. I started crying and he held me and kissed me while I cried and said he was sorry. After he left, I started to panic. Over the next week or so I kept calling and texting him trying to find out if he still had feelings for me and if he thought we might get back together after he had his space. He would always say he didn’t know for sure but it was possible. He would always emphasize that we just couldn’t be together “right now,” but he still loved me. I decided to try to let him go and have his space. I would do good for awhile, but then I would make the mistake of checking his Facebook or Myspace pages and panic when I would see that one of his female friends had commented on his page. So the cycle would start all over. Over the last week he has told me that he misses me and he started texting me almost every day. He always wants to know what I am doing and who I am doing it with. But then he would say that he is just hesitant about getting back into a relationship with me because he is afraid we would have the same old problems. He says he doesn’t want to be in a relationship with anyone right now and he wants to figure out how to control his anger again. I met him for lunch this weekend, and he kissed me. I was happy because I thought maybe I was coming through to him. But when we talked earlier today I realized we still haven’t gotten anywhere and he doesn’t seem to understand why I would feel that he was leading me on by kissing me. He keeps sending me mixed signals which is driving me absolutely crazy. So I have decided that maybe no contact really is the only way that I can regain emotional control of myself and finally make him see what he is missing… I think that since he already admits to missing me and loving me that I should have a head start… at least I hope. sparklemama on "Sparklemama's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/sparklemamas-nc-diary#post-22679 Sat, 20 Feb 2010 01:33:20 +0000 sparklemama 22679@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ So yesterday I sent my ex the official NC letter written word for word so I guess you can say today is my first official day of NC. When I first sent the letter I felt good and somewhat in control almost like finally the ball was in my court but after minutes turned into hours the good feeling started to wear off and here came my concerns and the sadness that comes when losing someone you really care about.Things with me and my ex are very complicated because we have a daughter together so while I know that when we do speak it should only have to do with my daughter I can't help but feel like I will never get passed him because keeping in touch with him even for our daughter's sake keeps my emotions in lock and he knows that. This time I am proving that I can live without him and not only to him but more importantly to myself because I have not felt like myself in such a long time, I feel like being with him and dealing with all that I have dealt with has caused me to become someone I always promised myself that I would never be... A needy,dependent person who cant seem to get herself together and who doesnt seem to love herself enough to say enough is enough.I wasn't always like this at one point in my life I was a fun loving person with no hangups I'm not sure when I made the transition to this person I have become. I am not only letting go of my ex but I am letting go of my best friend the one I called and told everything to...My go to person for everything in life. When he does call I plan on just putting our daughter on the phone and not saying one word to him at all... If we need to speak about our daughter then I will not talk about anything but my daughter. This is a true test to my strength and I am counting on myself to be able to do it my sanity is at stake here,I need this to regain my footing. The last time we hung out things seem good,almost like old times and I got the feeling that he wants something with me(what that something is I am unsure about) and I also get the feeling that he wants a family and maybe even wants to have more kids. I can't be the one to give him anything because I need a commitment and I need to know that no other woman is going to come along and he is going to go off chasing the first piece of tail that smiles at him and shows him some affection.I can't deal with any cheating or lying and I will not settle for less then what I want this time. The last time we spoke I told him that I was going to move to another state (not to far its only two states away and about three hours from where I live now) and he told me great do what you have to do for you and our daughter.I want to leave because the cost of living where I live now its just to expensive but I feel in a weird way that I am leaving him behind and that I am coming in the way of his relationship with our daughter... However right now I only live about 35 mins away from him and he doesn't come and see his daughter all that much so hey what the heck I guess I will just go for it.I'm supposed to be checking out an apt on tuesday and I am hoping it's what I am looking for and that I get the apt.I'm not going to lie I was hoping he got emotional or begged me not to go and his lack of emotion just made it feel like he didnt care at all. It's going to be weird if I do leave not to talk to him about all the specifics like I am used to doing.I feel like if I move out of the state and also now that I have gone with NC that it's almost like I am letting him run around with whomever he wants and I am pretty fearful that when I do speak to him again that he may not want to speak to me or that he has moved on with a new woman and a new life and that I will no longer be included in his life.That kind of fear is what causes me to feel the need to call him or see him so that I can verify that he is still open and that I still have a chance and once I communicate again then I am back to square one but its not going to happen this time. The thing that is keeping me strong is knowing that NC is pretty much my last resort...He doesn't speak to me and he has no respect for me,He doesn't take me seriously because I always come back and I have yet to let him see how it feels to not have me around.I am anxious to rebuild myself to the person I was before he came along or better yet even better than what I was. I have faith that this time I will be strong and I will get to the finish line <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> molly10 on "Molly's NC diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/mollys-nc-diary#post-21325 Fri, 05 Feb 2010 12:11:35 +0000 molly10 21325@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Sent the NC message to my husband yesterday. He still hasn't read the email. This is what I predict will happen once he reads the email. First he will send me a text saying something like "good for you" or "sounds good"... Within a week he will start texting/calling me, thinking I am not being serious. I will stick to my NC plan. He told me he wanted a divorce two months ago, the longest we've gone without talking is three days and it's always him calling me. I know it bothers him when I don't call and he's even asked me several times to call him more often... Now he'll have to wait a long time, because I will not be calling!!! allee on "Allee's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/allees-nc-diary#post-20793 Sat, 30 Jan 2010 12:33:04 +0000 allee 20793@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ My ex broke up with me over the phone on in the very beginning of this month. After that we talked two three times over the phone only as friends but then I gathered the courage to send my ex a NC note. I did it last Wednesday. MY NC NOTE: Hi, I agree with you about the decision to break up, i really believe its the best thing for both of us. I have some big decisions I need to make and I need some time to think them over. So I would really appreciate if you didn't contact me during this time. I will be in touch with you when I m ready. Now the thing is I got a call from my ex today (4 days later after the NC note).. I didn't answer. Now its killing me to know why he called me? What should i do? call him back?? sarina on "Sarina's NC diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/sarinas-nc-diary#post-21891 Fri, 12 Feb 2010 11:50:34 +0000 sarina 21891@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ So. . . .this is d 1st night of NC 4 me.i sent him d msg by mobile phone at 6 pm on 12feb.n nw its 12:30 am of d nxt day. nthing from him. . . .i m a bit dissappointed.n hurt may b.i was restless d whole evening,couldnt do my studies. . . .i dnt knw what to do. . . . didnt contact him since 22jan,saw him a few days ago. . . .hell!it hurt. . .:-( i hv a large friend circle n we hv lots of fun. . . .today is 1st day of Spring here in Bangladesh,a festive day. . . .lets see what happens. . . . hey all,plz stay strong n help me thru it. . . . InkyMandala on "InkyMandala's NC diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/inkymandalas-nc-diary#post-24510 Fri, 05 Mar 2010 17:10:32 +0000 InkyMandala 24510@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ We had the offical "I am breaking up with you" talk on Feb 11. On Feb 14 he left for a business trip and we didn't speak at all. Feb 17 he returned back to our place from his business trip and moved his stuff out to his own rental apt. On that day, Feb 17, I left the NC letter, although now I am thinking maybe it wasn't exactly right. It was almost verbatim the "Magic 2nd chance letter" from MoMU or MindMagic, can't remember which. "Dear Mr InkyMandala, I just wanted to let you know that I am really ok with your decision to break up. I saw it coming for a while now. Also, I wanted to apologize for reading your private emails. That was completely disrespectful to you and I am truly sorry for it. Oh -- some good news! I had a great change of fortune and luck yesterday. Funny timing, huh? I would love to tell you about it -- but in the future. You and I both need some space right now. Signed, InkyMandala" Since then we have had *minimal* contact dealing with his move-out and our dog who just died. We haven't had any discussions at all about the relationship, the breakup, the other woman, nothing. admin on "SWs NC (No Cocktails) Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/sws-nc-diary#post-9448 Thu, 15 Oct 2009 08:13:58 +0000 admin 9448@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Today is my birthday and I am giving myself a present...I have decided to stop drinking every night. I have watched all of you struggle to evolve, and now it's my turn. While you kick loves ass...I will start kicking liquors ass. Why? Because I am tired of it kicking mine. <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_twisted.gif" title=":twisted:" class="bb_smilies" /> I know our forum isn't for addiction recovery...but then again it is about getting your life back, right? This bad fucking habit started out of loneliness...just like many of you who started doing bad things to compensate for some kind of pain in your life. I am no different. The funny thing is that I don't drink all the time...only at night when I watch movies. This is more of a mental addiction than it is a physical one. I even had counseling and told the doctor how much I drank...but after all our sessions he said I wasn't an alcoholic...I was lonely. Me...I think it is just a habit like smoking was...I was used to doing it daily, and just needed to reprogram myself. Easier said than done, right? Now don't get me wrong I still want to get wasted from time to time...because I like it. <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_razz.gif" title=":P" class="bb_smilies" /> But I want to be the master...not the slave in this relationship. I have done it before...but because of things I have been going through these past 22 years. I slowly sink back into the pit. Not this time. After seeing how I could help others help themselves, I know I am not just a fuck up (like I used to think)...and all you members have inspired me. This is one relationship I don't want back (the daily drinking)...I just want my life back again. Does anyone understand what the liquor commercials mean by drink responsibly? How the fuck does that work, anyways? <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_cool.gif" title="8)" class="bb_smilies" /> So let my personal evolution begin! Bakspace on "Bakspace's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/bakspaces-nc-diary#post-17463 Mon, 21 Dec 2009 18:47:19 +0000 Bakspace 17463@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Alrighty, this is kinda confusing, and I'd ask you to read my recently posted Break Up Story. I'm sorta in a weird spot, where I've already been in NC with my ex for 6 days, but I did not start it with the proper message. I have already started my own 'personal evolution' process, and I'm wondering, should I go ahead and send this NC message out of the blue (I think that'd be confusing for her to receive) and continue with what I'm doing? Or should I just forget sending the message, and just keep evolving? If I am told to send the message, then I'll send it first thing tomorrow, but for now I have to go to sleep for work in the morning. Wish me the best of luck on my journey! Hungaro on "Hungaro's NC diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/hungaros-nc-diary#post-21576 Mon, 08 Feb 2010 13:37:47 +0000 Hungaro 21576@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I've sent my last sms one month ago...It was like this: " I know that both of us still have the feeling for each other...It would be good to talk sometimes when everything already calm down..." I know that thi is not the perfect sms, but I sent it one month before, and I just founf this website...we aren't in contact since this sms... Sometimes I feel so good, full with power, energy...I feel that there is nothing like : impossible! But sometimes I just start to thinking..thinking about that maybe somebody else hugging, kissing her...At this time I feeel that I am going crazy..I am unpatient, upset,angry...this is INSANE!!!! oneguy on "one guys break up story" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/one-guys-break-up-story#post-24844 Tue, 09 Mar 2010 12:05:05 +0000 oneguy 24844@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I’m going to get her back in my life… I am one guy. I have been with this girl for 5 years. We were engaged and trying to have kids. She had a miscarriage one year ago this month. She told me on Valentine’s Day that she was having second thoughts about our relationship and wanted a break. Of course I lost my shit and made all of the mistakes you are not supposed to make. I ended up finding out there is another guy in her life that she is spending all kinds of time with and even sleeping with this guy. She told me because I kept asking. I shouldn’t have because it just caused more pain. I have done some digging in my life and realized that I had an addiction and it was tarring us apart. For our last few years she would try to get me to quit but I was selfish and wouldn’t quit. I put on some weight and eventually quit my job. We were working for the same company as “Professionals”. Really sucked giving up the job I worked my whole life to get. She is still in the same job and found a man in the same job. So her life is exactly like it was when we first dated. This guy is 5 years older than her and has 2 kids from a previous marriage. So I know it’s not going to work which makes it even harder. I know she has feelings for me but she says she loves us both. Typical rebound relationship. So I have been doing some digging and found this site. With some hesitation I decided that I would give myself completely to the program because everything I was doing was not working. I sent out my no contact letter which made her stir. Wondering what I was doing, who I was with and what my plans are. So she called me and started asking questions. I am sticking to the plan. I will only talk to her about the house we own together as we are making arrangement to sell it. She wants to get a new job about 18 hrs away where her family lives. So time is not really on my side. She called me 12 times last night after I sent the letter out. I answered the first one because she called from my parent’s house. I thought it was my brother. My parents are out of town so it’s easy for her to go there. But I told her I had to go as I had someone on the other line. She wanted to know who I was talking to if it was a girl and I just told her that “it does not matter who I am talking to just know that I’m okay”. And I let her go. She called another 10 times while I was on the phone with other people talking about my plan. When I went to bed I unplugged the phone from the wall so she would not wake me up. I also did not want her to leave a message and get her release. Today I have turned my answering machine off. I will come on if you wait long enough. I can’t unplug it as it runs my 3 cordless phones in my house. These are my only phones. I’m going to continue to make myself scarce and have fun ignoring her for a while. I feel so much better sending out the letter. I felt right away that now if she does not call it because I asked her not to, not because she is with him. I am healing already. What a positive thing. I am also keeping myself distracted with an online dating site and looking for work. Putting my life back together one piece at a time. I want her back more than ever and will continue with this plan. I see that this plan allows me to heal and get myself off the hook and taking away her power over me. I will continue to journal as I don’t want to give up somewhere down the road. I want my baby back. The letter has so much power. I talked to another friend last night who got dumped yesterday. My ex kept calling while I was talking to her. So she had a taste for the power shift and said this is so crazy. Of course I gave her the site and she is going to look into it at her own pace. One guy, lasthope on "Dodi's No Contact Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/dodis-no-contact-diary#post-20291 Sat, 23 Jan 2010 09:42:30 +0000 lasthope 20291@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ This is my 3rd day of no contact. I was initially excited and optimistic but i think that was because i had found this site and new hope. I was feelin like "me" again. But its starting to fade and im finding it hard to be motivated to get out there and do things. When people say there ex is like a drug it is so true. I feel like this forum is my new drug!! Is that good? As if im constantly on here doesnt that mean im still obbssessing over the ex? I knew this would be tough, so im sticking with it 100%. Anyone who has actually stayed on here through out the whole process? Do u have anything to give me hope? It seems alot of people come on here "vent" There anger and upset and dissapear off radar without giving us all a conclusion. Maybe im wrong and just haven't figured this site out properly. S williams i want to say thank you. This forum is amazing, and i will stick it out till the end!! oneguy on "one guys no contact diary." http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/one-guys-no-contact-diary#post-24846 Tue, 09 Mar 2010 12:18:41 +0000 oneguy 24846@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Well today is the first day after I sent the message. I totally sent her for a loop. She went to my parents house to get something and called me from their I answered because I thouht it was my brother. She started to ask me questions about what I was doing and I reverted back to the plan. I told her I was on the other line with someone else. She started to get jelous I could tell. Asking who it was. I told her it does not matter who I am talking to just know that I'm okay. She did not like this. I let her go saying have a good night. I then got the call I was waiting for. A friend who got dumped yesterday by her boyfriend. We talked for about two hours about all the things I have been learning about how to get your ex back. She was very sceptical so was I too. But while I was talking to her and someone else who got their ex back she called 10 times. In about 3 hours. Massive power shift. I felt good to ignore her for a change. Absence makes the heart grow fonder I was saying to myself. She misses the hell out of me but just does not want to be with me right now. When I went to bed I unplugged the phone so she could not keep calling or leave a message. Today I turned off the answering machine. But I know she knows how to turn it back on so Im hoping she will respect the letter I sent. I sent it to facebook copy and paste. Only changed the one where it says kids to the house. We are trying to sell a house we own together. I also told her to only call about the house and then said you know what dont call email me. But she called like a crazy person last night. wooo hooo. Now maybe she will think of what she had now that I am gone. If not I am already healing and feeling better not waiting to talk to her or saying the same things over and over again. And having her say the same things. It's time for a differnt approach. Oh I talked to a friend who got his ex back and asked tell me about what you did. He decribed a story so simular to the free plan. He was in a new relationship and left it in a heart beat for her. Now they are living in the same city. It showed me that it does work. Somepeople stuble across how to do it and other have to read it like us. One guy, dragonkidd15 on "Dragonkidd15 NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/dragonkidd15-nc-diary#post-18344 Fri, 01 Jan 2010 16:12:49 +0000 dragonkidd15 18344@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ please reffer to my break up story So toda, first da of the year, I sent my ex th NC letter saying: Hi, I agree with you about the decision to break up, I really believe it was the best thing for both of us. I have some big decisions to make and I need some time to think them over. I would really appreciate it if you didn’t contact me during this time. I will be in touch when I am ready. dragonkidd15 p.s. There's a letter i sent you before i left (my city) for (where she was). Please don't open it. Thank you for all the good times, they will be appreciated. To wish she also replied: Hi, I am really happy to know you feel it was better too. Take your time. And take care. (ex name) ps. Thank you for everything we've shared I also refrined to send her a happy new year sms ... i didn't get one too I'm puzzled by her reply, does it mean she's actually Ok with every thing I really want her back but at the same time if i don't i know that I would have moved on if I follow the plan (whish i paln on doing)... so its a win win for me Re garding the letter i sent... its actually a love letter that i wrote a week before the break up it has a sate on it which i usally write... but here's the thing... i just remembered that i havent sent the letter... i just found it's still in m bag... should i send it? will this push her away or draw her near? she knows i sent her a leter before we met but since its the christmas rush, she hasnt received it yet (i knew before writing it that she'll be getting it after the holidays)... so should i send the letter? i can post a copy of the letter here if necessary i also have turned off my facebook account. now i'm totally off the radar beside on the private blog we have that i havent visited or plan on visiting... was this over reacting? help! nevergaveup on "NeverGaveUp's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/nevergaveups-nc-diary#post-24796 Mon, 08 Mar 2010 22:51:47 +0000 nevergaveup 24796@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Me and my girl have not been together for almost a year, and could use some insight and inspiration. I love this girl with all my heart still to the day, that's why I picked the name Nevergaveup, But please read my breakup story first. I sent my NC letter 2 weeks ago. Word for Word She responded the very next day via email with: "Well I haven't contacted you. Best of luck with everything, hope it turns out well for you." That wasn't the response I was hoping for, but at least I got one. That response just sounds cold and emotionless to me, it sounds like she just doesn't care. Any thoughts? <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_shaking.gif" title=":shaking:" class="bb_smilies" /> nevergaveup on "NeverGaveUp's Break-up Story" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/nevergaveups-break-up-story#post-24794 Mon, 08 Mar 2010 22:11:13 +0000 nevergaveup 24794@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I'm going to try and keep this as short as possible. Me and my ex had a couple of break ups during our relationship but we always worked things out. I think the main reason for her breaking up was that she started getting anxious thinking that I would never propose to her settle down and commit. So my story begins. I proposed to my ex at the end of 2007(together for 5yrs at this point) and couple days later she says she's not sure if this is what she wants right now. So I say "ok" what do you want to do then? She says she wants time to think, so I give her a month. She comes back, gives me the ring and says she needs some time to herself, so I gave her time. 3 months later she contacts me and wants to meet and talk. We go out and talk and she tells me that she did alot of thinking and wants to be with me and wants us to be married. I asked her how sure she was with her decision because she had seemed uncertain of what she wanted but she assured me that this is what she wants. So we get back together and things are great. After a month or so she tells me that we should just get married quick at the courthouse and a year or so later we'll plan a big reception or something. So I said "if that's what you want then, ok". So May09 we got married, she moved in in june and she started giving me problems about what it was I did for work, that she didn't feel secure with what I did and that I should find something more stable I guess. I told her be patient and I'll take care of things. 2 months later in Aug she files for divorce and leaves me while I was at work one day and never came home that night. She packed her stuff and left. The next day I get served divorce papers at my house. I try talking to her but she didn't want to talk. So from Aug to the end of Dec of 09 we didn't do much talking. Once the new year hit we started talking again, she told me she got her own place, we started hanging out again doing stuff together. We talked about our relationship and she said she would be willing to work on things but take it slow and see what happens, so I agree. Shortly after we started talking she lost her job, so I felt bad and was helping her with money and doing stuff for her because I still loved her and cared for her and didn't want anything bad to happen to her. So all went well up until April09 and that was the last time I saw her, We spoke in May and she told me that we can't be together right now and that she met someone else that she wants to get to know. I could not F%#@ing believe it. Here I am being the nice guy helping her out, showing her I still care and that I want to be with her and make it work and she writes me off like I mean nothing. So from May09 til now we haven't spoke to each other except for emails here and there. I don't feel that I was to pushy or needy with any of my emails, I just let her know how I felt about her. I didn't know much of a plan to try and follow til just recently when I found this site. I was trying to read others stories to see if they had one like mine about being broke up for a long period of time and couldn't seem to find one similar before I posted my story. Alot of the stories I've read are about people that have only been broke up a week or month or 2. Anyway, I sent my NC letter to her 2 weeks ago and just been scared if this was the way to go. I'm not doubting the plan just wondering if there is any additional advice about my particular situation. I love her so much it's sick and I'm scared about how it's been almost a year since I saw her and if there is any chance of us being together and whether or not she's forgot about me and still talking to someone.[code] brirehab on "i just got in a sort of fight with my ex after 24 days of no contact ! now what?" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/i-just-got-in-a-sort-of-fight-with-my-ex-after-24-days-of-no-contact-now-what#post-24671 Sun, 07 Mar 2010 21:32:01 +0000 brirehab 24671@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ so my ex left me to go be with another girl three months ago and i still hold that hurt of betrayal and never got to tell him how angry i was about it. so today he text me and i completly thought i was ready to talk to him. he texted me about his dog needing to be put to sleep and so i said if he ever needed someone i was there and he said he does and i told him he could call me later.so we kind of texted a little bit throught out the day..i was tryna make him feel better and then we talked a little bit about my health issue i was dealing with. then at the end of the night all that anger just built up again so i did the worst thing possible and text him telling him that i thought i could talk to him and i thought i forgave him for his betrayl and leaving me to be with another girl but i was just getting mad all over again so i wasnt ready he replied saying okay we can talk again when i feel the time is right and i let my anger get to me and said that i dont think we ever will talk and that i didnt hate him but i fuckin cant stand him and he replied back sayin he cant stand me either and then i asked if he was even happy with the way things turned out and he said yes and now im very hurt but i said i really hope so and that i hope he lives a good safe life and then i said bye. did i just screw everything up? im soo hurt right now i dont even know what to do admin on "Inspirational Movies, Books, and Songs" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/inspirational-movies-and-songs#post-388 Wed, 20 May 2009 06:31:31 +0000 admin 388@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Here we will start a list of Movies, Books, and Songs that will help people to stay inspired and motivated. What movie/book/song has moved you to find more inner strength? Movies Bram Stoker's Dracula (hot vampire chicks alert!) <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_iagree.gif" title=":iagree:" class="bb_smilies" /> Love and Basketball Serendipity Maid in Manhattan The Shawshank Redemption It Could Happen To You Cinderella Man The Bucket List Bagger Vance Million Dollar Baby The Green Mile Rudy Sea Biscuit Invincible Brave Heart Dragon Heart Radio Beautiful Mind The Little Buddha Castaway The Love Letter Forgetting Sarah Marshall Monsters vs. Aliens 500 Days of Summer The Hangover ( <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_cool.gif" title="8)" class="bb_smilies" /> Hmmm... sounds like my autobiography) Cashback Around the Bend Gladiator The Secret Fireproof Songs Leona Lewis - Better in Time Destiny's child - Survivor The Supremes -You keep me Hangin on Mary J. Blige - I'm not gon cry Whitney Houston - It's not right but it's ok Joss Stone - Bruised But Not Broken Katrina & The Waves - Walking on Sunshine Whitney Houston - I learned from the best David Cook - Come Back to Me One Republic - Come Home Carl Carlton - She's a Bad Mama Jama Daft Punk - Harder Better Faster Stronger Jackson 5 - I Want You Back Mika - Love Today John Mayer - Say Peter Gabriel - Talk to me "Because" - Jessica Mauboy Laura Doyle - Let you Go Kate Voegele - Forever and Almost Always Electric Light Orchestra - Mr. Blue Sky - Lily Allen - Smile Tom Petty - I Won't Back Down Amy Winehouse - tears dry on their own Christina Augilera - fighter Britney Spears - stronger Annie Lenox - walking on broken glass Jennifer Lopez - aint it funny Kelly Clarkson - since you've been gone Lilly Allen - smile First wives club - young and free La roux - Bullet proof Candi Stanton - Young hearts run free Pink - So what Katy Perry - Hot and cold Bonjovi - Its my life Gloria Gaynor - I will survive Aretha Franklin - Respect Journey - Don't stop believing GEORGE MICHAEL - FREEDOM MotorHead - I Don't believe a Word Motorhead - Liar Emmylou Harris - But you're Supposed To Be Feeling Good Emmylou Harris - Somehow Concrete Blonde - Joey John Barrowman - I am what I am David Cook - Time Of My Life The Rolling Stones - Time is on My Side Whitney Houston - Salute Books The Last Lecture *The Game of Life by Florence Scovel Shinn The Choice - Og Mandino *The Greatest Salesman in the World - Og Mandino The Power of Focus - Mark Victor Hansen The Aladdin Factor - Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen *The Mind of the Soul - Gary Zukov *Unstoppable - Cynthia Kersey *I Dare You - William F Danforth Passion, Profit, Power - Marshall Sylver A Return to Love - Marianne Williamson The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens by Sean Covey Who Moved My Cheese? - Spencer Johnson, MD Pulling Your Own Strings: Dynamic Techniques for Dealing with Other People and Living Your Life as You Choose - Wayne W. Dyer Katka on "Katka´s NC diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/katka%c2%b4s-nc-diary#post-21900 Fri, 12 Feb 2010 12:32:24 +0000 Katka 21900@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ My boyfriend dumped me at New years eve - 31.12.09, after 2 years of our relationship. The reason was his scare of really serious relationship and marring. He wanted to stay be friends. So we did. First 14 days we saw each other trough Skype (4cca times). I did not cover my emotions. I never cry in front of him, but I said my truly feelings. I never was the first one who start to call or write the messages. He was writing me messages on FB cca 4 times per week until I send him NC e-mail. I decided to start NC, after he send me FB message with sex offer - 05.01.10 (one month later we break off). I put my Skype and facebook to offline status. Than was 3 days calm. The 3th day I got message to my phone about our economy, and question If I am OK. I politely replied for finance side, and answer him yes, I am OK. After 2 days calm. The 5th day I got a message to my phone. That he is worry about me, he saw me in a dream, he wanted to know if I am Ok, because not all the people are good. I did no replay thanks advice from this sites. (This message he sent probably after he saw on my facebook profile, that I published adding myself as a member of group "Live For Today, Because Yesterdays Over, And Tomorrow May Never Come :)" and adding a friend - rapper who has a lot of pictures with graffiti) After 2 days calm. The 7th day our friend put on Facebook pictures with me from one action. Where I were before 2 days. On one picture I am there with one another girl and another 3 guys. My ex boyfriend wrote under the picture: "I wish all of you the best...!!!" That harted me, even if I do not why exactly, but I hope his wish will came be truth. Psychically I think am doing well. I am work on my "new life". ...I start to do belly dance, I do a lot of talk with my family, I go often clubbing and see my friends. Off course I still love my ex boyfriend and I have pain but If I have to be strong. Another way, I am gonna false. Right? <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> Rabbit on "Rabbit NC's" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/rabbit-ncs#post-14700 Wed, 25 Nov 2009 13:25:49 +0000 Rabbit 14700@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ My first NC's, and I am very scary, worried and uncertain about it. I have been dating with my ex-boyfriend for eleven yrs (we were in LDR for almost two yrs ~ he went back to our home country and work), he has been constantly calling me even though we broke up four months ago (I travelled all the way back home to see him). He tried to get me into believing we could be "Friend", then we might get back together someday. He would tell me that he missed me, and he even gave me a good-bye kiss over the phone ~ the last call that we had. I was very confused, and I had the same depressed feelings over again. He told me he did not want to commit, but he still wanted me to be around ~ so called "Friend". He told me he was excited to hear that I will be travelling back home again this X'mas, and we can have some fun together. But I found it unfair to me, I have to live the sad feelings all the time. He even told me ~ he will let me know if he has a gf in the future. That's when I encountered this website, I wrote a very Short NC to him ~ even though I wonder if he will find me out of the blue since we will be on the phone once a week. I still miss him a lot even though it has been four months. I still cry over it, so I am not ready to be around him at all ~ I will try to resist answering his calls (if he ever calls), emails and calling him myself. Hope I am doing the right move!! lilpink on "Lil Pink's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/lil-pinks-nc-diary#post-24239 Tue, 02 Mar 2010 11:15:00 +0000 lilpink 24239@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I started NC yesterday by texting the following message to my ex: Hi, I agree with you about the decision to break up, I really believe it was the best thing for both of us. I have some big decisions to make and I need some time to think them over. I would really appreciate it if you didn't contact me during this time. I will be in touch when I am ready. I had to send it over in 2 or 3 different messages but after I hit the "send" button I giggled for some odd reason! I am sure the message really caught him by surprise because I have been so focused on him for the past three months. After sending the message, the reality of it all really sunk in and I felt liberated and empowered. Yes, I was finally back in control! I didn't receive a response from him. I thought for sure I would get an "okay" but nope, nothing! And I am okay with that. After reading through other diaries, I have realized that he probably hasn't responded for the simple fact that I have asked HIM for time to work on these "big decisions". So far, I am feeling okay. Normally, I am the type of female that can quickly get over situations and move on. We have only broke up three days ago but as of right now, I feel like I want him back because I think he was such an awesome guy. It just sucks that circumstances prohibited us from having the type of relationship we both said that we wanted. For now, I am going to start my pro's and con's list and just take it all one day at a time. Regardless of how things end up, I know that I will come out of this all as a better person. gary chaimbers on "my LDR nc diary - gary chaimbers" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/my-ldr-nc-diary-gary-chaimbers#post-20902 Sun, 31 Jan 2010 15:57:01 +0000 gary chaimbers 20902@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Hi all, This is the start of my NC LDR dairy. I will be sending my LDR NC letter by post to my ex tomorrow morning. I have a question does the NC start from tomorrow or from the date that my ex receives the letter which should around 4 to 5 days and if she replies does the NC start from the second NC letter if I have to send one? warmly, Gary Leeka on "Leeka's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/leekas-nc-diary#post-23810 Fri, 26 Feb 2010 14:00:36 +0000 Leeka 23810@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I sent the NC message, word for word. This is day 1 of NC. I feel strong and to be honest, I am not sure I really want him back. I know this process will help me realize exactly what it is I do want and that's awesome. I have been focusing on myself. I am angry at myself for letting myself go during the relationship, something I promised myself I wouldn't do. I have been working out again, eating better and hanging out with friends. It has been hard, but everyday it gets a little easier. I haven't yet received a response from the NC message. live_laughlove on "my break up story" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/my-break-up-story-14#post-24756 Mon, 08 Mar 2010 16:48:49 +0000 live_laughlove 24756@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ me and my ex boyfriend were only together for about 6 and a half months properly. it may not seem like long, but he was my first love. at first everything was great, we went on holiday together, spent as much time as we could together and i thought we were going to last longer than we did. i started university, and moved about an hour away, which really isnt that far. i came home every single weekend to come and see him, i never once cheated on him. i did everything i could to be the best girlfriend i could to him, and even to this day, i truly believe i couldnt have done better. one day, we had an argument which was nothing to do with our relationship, and he told me we were drifting apart and that we should go our seperate ways. i was heartbroken. i cried a lot, begged, pleaded, did everything i could. i decided to stop contact (without the reccomended message) for about 3 weeks. he has said some very hurtful things to me, including saying he regrets our relationship. i have since sent the recommended message from this site, and am proud to say i am on about week 3 (i've lost count of the days) and haven't so far broken it. we've been split up over 3 months now, he's seeing someone else, i'm not properly over him. i think it's time to get my life back <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> Sam487 on "Sam487 NC diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/sam487-nc-diary#post-24484 Fri, 05 Mar 2010 09:11:12 +0000 Sam487 24484@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Hey, ok only day 1 sent him the message yesterday evening scarey!! But I kinda feel liberated, I feel good that he is no longer controlling my mind and am I worried I never got a reply?? No why would I be I specifically told him not to contact me so he's gotta be pretty dumb too go ahead and do it lol. I have been thinkng lots if things what if he's with someone else? Etc etc then I think who gives a shit what he's doing this is me tine right?? It's quite funny when you think about it how this one man has occupied your thoughts for soo long I have not been eating properly etc etc but now it's Time to put me first and besides I was a woman in my own right before he came along! And the funniest is I didn't even know he existed a few years back. Ok I do have my down moments but if I talk about them it will only make me feel more sad I know I have lots mire weeks to go so wont be this positive all the time lol. But if u can't make yourself feel better who can? They say evrything happens for a reason and I strongly believe in it. Maybe me and my ex do get back together ( you gave to be prepared invade you don't) bur either way lifes has to go on!