How to Kick Loves Ass - Break Up Help Forum

How to Kick Loves Ass - Break Up Help Forum » Recent Topics http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Free Break up Help, Relationship Advice, and Plan to Get Your Ex Back en-US Sun, 14 Mar 2010 10:20:01 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 <![CDATA[Search]]> q http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/search.php Hungaro on "Hungaro's NC diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/hungaros-nc-diary#post-21576 Mon, 08 Feb 2010 14:37:47 +0000 Hungaro 21576@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I've sent my last sms one month ago...It was like this: " I know that both of us still have the feeling for each other...It would be good to talk sometimes when everything already calm down..." I know that thi is not the perfect sms, but I sent it one month before, and I just founf this website...we aren't in contact since this sms... Sometimes I feel so good, full with power, energy...I feel that there is nothing like : impossible! But sometimes I just start to thinking..thinking about that maybe somebody else hugging, kissing her...At this time I feeel that I am going crazy..I am unpatient, upset,angry...this is INSANE!!!! sarina on "Sarina's NC diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/sarinas-nc-diary#post-21891 Fri, 12 Feb 2010 12:50:34 +0000 sarina 21891@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ So. . . .this is d 1st night of NC 4 me.i sent him d msg by mobile phone at 6 pm on 12feb.n nw its 12:30 am of d nxt day. nthing from him. . . .i m a bit dissappointed.n hurt may b.i was restless d whole evening,couldnt do my studies. . . .i dnt knw what to do. . . . didnt contact him since 22jan,saw him a few days ago. . . .hell!it hurt. . .:-( i hv a large friend circle n we hv lots of fun. . . .today is 1st day of Spring here in Bangladesh,a festive day. . . .lets see what happens. . . . hey all,plz stay strong n help me thru it. . . . admin on "Inspirational Movies, Books, and Songs" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/inspirational-movies-and-songs#post-388 Wed, 20 May 2009 07:31:31 +0000 admin 388@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Here we will start a list of Movies, Books, and Songs that will help people to stay inspired and motivated. What movie/book/song has moved you to find more inner strength? Movies Bram Stoker's Dracula (hot vampire chicks alert!) <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_iagree.gif" title=":iagree:" class="bb_smilies" /> Love and Basketball Serendipity Maid in Manhattan The Shawshank Redemption It Could Happen To You Cinderella Man The Bucket List Bagger Vance Million Dollar Baby The Green Mile Rudy Sea Biscuit Invincible Brave Heart Dragon Heart Radio Beautiful Mind The Little Buddha Castaway The Love Letter Forgetting Sarah Marshall Monsters vs. Aliens 500 Days of Summer The Hangover ( <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_cool.gif" title="8)" class="bb_smilies" /> Hmmm... sounds like my autobiography) Cashback Around the Bend Gladiator The Secret Fireproof Songs Duncan Sheik - Barely Breathing Leona Lewis - Better in Time Destiny's child - Survivor The Supremes -You keep me Hangin on Mary J. Blige - I'm not gon cry Whitney Houston - It's not right but it's ok Joss Stone - Bruised But Not Broken Katrina & The Waves - Walking on Sunshine Whitney Houston - I learned from the best David Cook - Come Back to Me One Republic - Come Home Carl Carlton - She's a Bad Mama Jama Daft Punk - Harder Better Faster Stronger Jackson 5 - I Want You Back Mika - Love Today John Mayer - Say Peter Gabriel - Talk to me "Because" - Jessica Mauboy Laura Doyle - Let you Go Kate Voegele - Forever and Almost Always Electric Light Orchestra - Mr. Blue Sky - Lily Allen - Smile Tom Petty - I Won't Back Down Amy Winehouse - tears dry on their own Christina Augilera - fighter Britney Spears - stronger Annie Lenox - walking on broken glass Jennifer Lopez - aint it funny Kelly Clarkson - since you've been gone Lilly Allen - smile First wives club - young and free La roux - Bullet proof Candi Stanton - Young hearts run free Pink - So what Katy Perry - Hot and cold Bonjovi - Its my life Gloria Gaynor - I will survive Aretha Franklin - Respect Journey - Don't stop believing GEORGE MICHAEL - FREEDOM MotorHead - I Don't believe a Word Motorhead - Liar Emmylou Harris - But you're Supposed To Be Feeling Good Emmylou Harris - Somehow Concrete Blonde - Joey John Barrowman - I am what I am David Cook - Time Of My Life The Rolling Stones - Time is on My Side Whitney Houston - Salute Books The Last Lecture *The Game of Life by Florence Scovel Shinn The Choice - Og Mandino *The Greatest Salesman in the World - Og Mandino The Power of Focus - Mark Victor Hansen The Aladdin Factor - Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen *The Mind of the Soul - Gary Zukov *Unstoppable - Cynthia Kersey *I Dare You - William F Danforth Passion, Profit, Power - Marshall Sylver A Return to Love - Marianne Williamson The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens by Sean Covey Who Moved My Cheese? - Spencer Johnson, MD Pulling Your Own Strings: Dynamic Techniques for Dealing with Other People and Living Your Life as You Choose - Wayne W. Dyer Hannah on "hannah nc letter" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/hannah-nc-letter#post-22524 Thu, 18 Feb 2010 15:01:46 +0000 Hannah 22524@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I just sent him an email saying this : "Hi, I agree with you about the decision to break up, I really believe it was the best thing for both of us. I have some big decisions to make and I need some time to think them over. I would really appreciate it if you didn't contact me during this time. I will be in touch when I am ready." The subject was "You Were Right" Day 1 begins... salonii on "My very messy story" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/my-very-messy-story#post-25232 Sat, 13 Mar 2010 23:40:54 +0000 salonii 25232@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Hi all, Mine is a messy story, but please, please may I request that you don't judge me? I am here for help, not recrimination. That said, let me begin. Two and a half years ago, I met this man...he was perfect in every way. We hit it off almost immediately and a friendship blossomed. The catch....both of us were married. He with an adopted daughter and me with no children. What brought us close was maybe the common factor of children - I always wanted to have kids, but my husband of ten years never wanted to. That, and the fact that we were two very different personalities, had broken down the relationship much before I met this man. His story: his wife was unable to have children, while he longed to have kids. He forcefully adopted a little girl, against the wife's wishes. Their relationship too, had broken down and the only point of communication was the little girl. We both live in different cities and so shared a long-distance relationship, meeting maybe once a month. But over the two years, we discovered so much in common, it was like we were soulmates. And then I got pregnant. There was no way that I was going to get rid of the baby - neither did he want me to. We were both elated. All through the time I was pregnant, we dreamed about how once the baby was here, we would both seperate from our current spouses and build a life together. In the meantime, my husband moved out. Our relationship had broken down completely. The child is here - he is now 7 months. When my boyfriend went to tell his wife about me and the child, she was shocked, though she had been suspecting him of seeing someone else all along. She just didnt think there would be a child involved. She threatened him saying she would leave with the adopted daughter and he would never be able to see the daughter again, if he moved in with me. Now, my boyfriend loves that little girl as much as he loves my son. She is now 6 years old and we had hoped we would be able to transition her without impacting her unduly. However, my boyfriend's wife started emotionally blackmailing him into staying - by pulling the guilt trigger on him - about how the adopted daughter still didnt know she was adopted, about how it would affect her if the father left, about how she would never let him see her again. Cut a long story short, my boyfriend has decided to stay put for his daughter's sake. I know its killing him inside, because he really loves me and our son. Its killing me, coz I really love this man and I want my son to know his father. I was even ready to let him remain where he is, yet still be an important part of his son's life, but the wife won't have any of it. I am not sure that we are broken up yet..but he is minimizing contact with me. I have been needy and clingy and calling and pleading. I decided to stop doing that, and didnt call for two days..he immediately called me then, saying he was worried for me and that he loved me. I am not sure what my situation counts for - its an absolute mess, I know. I am not sure if I should just let him go and move on, or try and convince him that this way, he will not achieve anyone's happiness - not his wife's, not his own, certainly not mine - and both the children will still be impacted. Should I just send him the No contact letter and use the time to sort out what to do with myself and my son? He loves our son and cries because he is away from him, yet he isn't standing up for him. Can you please help me? This is the first time I have spoken about this to anyone at all - and its been a month and half since I last saw him. It's been a painful month and half, with him trying to be "real" as he calls it. I don't know how he can consider me or my son unreal. <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_sad.gif" title=":(" class="bb_smilies" /> KC on "KC's NC" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/kcs-nc#post-15013 Sat, 28 Nov 2009 14:06:51 +0000 KC 15013@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Been a week now. Holding out quite ok. First few days were very difficult with me looking at the phone each time it rang expecting it could be him. Not in that stage anymore, but at times feel angry at him for not making contact, I know its early and I hope to soon get over even this anger. Making new friends and started flirting a bit. I do still hope to get back but I tell myself that if it has to work out it will. What sometimes gives me strength is that I have done all the texting, emailing everything possible, so now not more that I can do there. So NC is the best course I tell myself when I feel low. I realise I was a much fun person early on in the relationship and somewhere I lost that along the way and became too emotional. I want that fun person back, coz thats the person people fall in love with isnt it? molly10 on "Molly's NC diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/mollys-nc-diary#post-21325 Fri, 05 Feb 2010 13:11:35 +0000 molly10 21325@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Sent the NC message to my husband yesterday. He still hasn't read the email. This is what I predict will happen once he reads the email. First he will send me a text saying something like "good for you" or "sounds good"... Within a week he will start texting/calling me, thinking I am not being serious. I will stick to my NC plan. He told me he wanted a divorce two months ago, the longest we've gone without talking is three days and it's always him calling me. I know it bothers him when I don't call and he's even asked me several times to call him more often... Now he'll have to wait a long time, because I will not be calling!!! love4learning on "Love4Learning - No Contact Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/love4learning-no-contact-diary#post-22206 Mon, 15 Feb 2010 23:17:44 +0000 love4learning 22206@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Day 2 - This is day 2 of no contact after making a commitment on this webpage. However, tomorrow will complete 14 days of no contact. It has really been challenging for me, considering I work with my ex. Not to mention, my his office is right down the hall from mine and I could see every person as they entered or left his office. Therefore, I moved the furniture around in my office so that I didn't have to see him. And, go the opposite way to avoid passing by his office. And, I am determined to stick with the plan because I suspect all of this time he has been seeing me and someone else in our office, possibly another lady as well. I will continue to remind myself that I deserve more from a relationship and that I need to love myself enough not to settle. I also created my "No Contact Journal" as prescribed by the plan. Now, I just need to focus on not discussing my ex as well. Well, off to write in my journal. Today was a good day. oneguy on "oneguys nc diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/oneguys-nc-diary-1#post-25221 Sat, 13 Mar 2010 17:04:57 +0000 oneguy 25221@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Today was a very hard day. She called again this afternoon. Wondering about the house. Thankfully my parents were there as they are helping me move out of my house. So they took the phone call. She is completly ignoring my request for time. So i constantly have to be tested. Very frustration when all you want to do is talk to her and you know its not in your best interest. I know I have to stick with the nc to heal to have a chance and to really deceide if I want her back or not. I feel great reading the inspirational letters. I also feel better when I dont talk to her for a while but then of course she calls. And keeps calling. One day she called me 12 times that my phone recorded until I unplugged the phone. Im trying to do the right thing for myself one day at a time. Rabbit on "Rabbit NC's" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/rabbit-ncs#post-14700 Wed, 25 Nov 2009 14:25:49 +0000 Rabbit 14700@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ My first NC's, and I am very scary, worried and uncertain about it. I have been dating with my ex-boyfriend for eleven yrs (we were in LDR for almost two yrs ~ he went back to our home country and work), he has been constantly calling me even though we broke up four months ago (I travelled all the way back home to see him). He tried to get me into believing we could be "Friend", then we might get back together someday. He would tell me that he missed me, and he even gave me a good-bye kiss over the phone ~ the last call that we had. I was very confused, and I had the same depressed feelings over again. He told me he did not want to commit, but he still wanted me to be around ~ so called "Friend". He told me he was excited to hear that I will be travelling back home again this X'mas, and we can have some fun together. But I found it unfair to me, I have to live the sad feelings all the time. He even told me ~ he will let me know if he has a gf in the future. That's when I encountered this website, I wrote a very Short NC to him ~ even though I wonder if he will find me out of the blue since we will be on the phone once a week. I still miss him a lot even though it has been four months. I still cry over it, so I am not ready to be around him at all ~ I will try to resist answering his calls (if he ever calls), emails and calling him myself. Hope I am doing the right move!! matlau on "matlau NC diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/matlau-nc-diary#post-25058 Thu, 11 Mar 2010 20:17:36 +0000 matlau 25058@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I just sent my ex the NC message.I copy and paste the exact message as shown on Scott blog. It was hard but I did it. Whatever I did before wasn't gonna work so I have nothing loose but take control back. I'm gonna need your help that's for sure!!! Kate on "How I got my life and hopefully my ex back..." http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/how-i-got-my-life-and-hopefully-my-ex-back#post-22752 Sat, 20 Feb 2010 12:49:20 +0000 Kate 22752@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ OK...I took the plunge. I finally sent my NC e-mail. My ex and I have had NC for the past month, prior to that we had limited contact for several weeks. Based on our last conversation I think that is how he wants things, so I am not really sure if he will respond to NC. He just seemed so angry with me and I did not do a thing to deserve that type of treatment. He is angry at the world because his mom passed away. I feel so bad and just wish that I could be there for him. He pushed me away and put up a wall. Just not sure if that wall can be broken down??? I am spending the weekend pampering myself...going to the spa and getting my hair cut. Makes me a little sad because he always loved my hair, especially after I would get it cut...too bad for him....he is missing out!!! -Kate finallyfedup on "Finallyfedup's" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/finallyfedups#post-19249 Sun, 10 Jan 2010 23:37:11 +0000 finallyfedup 19249@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I initiated first NC on Dec 29 after not hearing a word from him for 5 days (refer to break up story if interested). The next day I got a reply from him wishing me wisdom, knowledge, happiness and peace making the decisions I have to make and while he was at it he went ahead and wished me a blessed, safe and happy new year. NICE! Good Example that NC does work :)! I didn't reply and kept reading this forum and using the plan. I started my journal a while back and have wrote more since I found this plan. The journal has been a blessing and I write in it everyday, sometimes 5 to 8 times a day! I kept the NC up and it's been very tough. I had given him so much of my time and now all this free time I had was killing me but I read the forum and plan over and over and over and everyday I would read the same thing I read the day before but it would finally hit me as to what it meant. For instance, NC! I just wanted to sit around and wait the 30 without evolving and expecting things to work....I was fooling myself as I learned from this forum last week :)! I broke the NC on Jan 5, I just couldn't stand it anymore and called him, he didn't answer and I hung up. Then decided to call right back and leave a message...he answered! We had a great conversation (thank god I had been evolving), I didn't ask him a series of questions like I use to, talked about the weather (paha), talked about people we knew in common, and then I asked how he has been? He said he had refocused and redirected himself to "him" and that he has went to himself...hmmmmmm? And he is doing better and the anger isn't near as bad (he said that several times). He met his quota at work in December which he was stressing over and things were getting better. He talked and laughed like I have never heard him laugh with me before....it was a happy laugh, which made me happy, he was happy to hear from me and hoped that whatever BIG decision I had to make was going well. Then stupid ass me let it slide right out of my BIG mouth and said that BIG decision I am dealing with is HIM! I changed the subject quickly and told him I must go now because it's lunch time.....and he replied.... "wait, how are you"? I replied, "evolving". He then asked if I had gotten "me" back yet, I replied "half way"..I said "Take Care" and he replied "wait, wait"....with a pause "wait"....then he said "I love you"........I replied "have a good day and hung up"! Exactly 5 seconds later I RESENT the NC text again and I haven't heard a word from him since then nor have I contacted him since then. I am staying on track this time with the NC, I feel it's working but it is sooooo hard for me to let go and do without him!! I will just keep reading this forum, writing in my journal and continue to make every effort to evolve myself and get my life back! Any suggestions are welcomed...I will listen! riegs000 on "Riegs000 No Contact Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/riegs000-no-contact-diary#post-19349 Mon, 11 Jan 2010 20:05:22 +0000 riegs000 19349@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Hi all, well i posted my break up, sort of make up then wierd LDR thing story under the title LDR in limbo yesterday. IT felt good to fianlly get all the shit down finally. Made me feel like i was letting it go. Well its all done now. Well with it being our long summer holidays here in australia, from dec to feb, and her living on the other side of australia (which to all you Americans means we are sparated by 4000km of desert, Oz is after all 95% desert lol) we wouldnt be seeing each other for 3 months. I went into the hols hoping to keep the relationship going. At first she partcipated but then by new years it was apparent to me that by sending me one text a week with no affection in them at all that she wasnt as interested as me. Well with the help of guys in the forum I decided enough was enough, I wanted control and my life back. I was sick and tired of sending her loving texts like a good bf in a LDR should, and getting nothing back. So with the help of you guys i sent her the in limbo NC message and deleted and blocked her off fb. New year, new start right. So now begins the process that should ave started back in april when we actually broke up. I know she will back in feb, however i wont be contacting her when she gets back bc that will be just running straight back to her. I only 22, and if im going to be in a serious long term relationship with someone it better be a good one. Now starts the evolution! Bc i havnt recently suffered the trauma of actually being dumped (BUT dw i know the pain oh so well, back in april cried to her for a week straight beggin uuuhhh how pathetic) I feeling not quite so down as would have been if i just been actually dumped. Nevertheless this is difficult. I am trusting scott's plan this time and going into unknown to ge tmy control back. I havnt heard from her since new years and she hasnt responed to the NC letter but its time to let go. as mario would say in a race of mario cart- Letsa GO MJ on "MJ's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/jolyths-nc-diary#post-24146 Mon, 01 Mar 2010 10:43:16 +0000 MJ 24146@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ So, I am already on Day 3 of NC and man does it bite! We used to talk and text several times a day and now I am like "What am I supposed to do with my spare time now??" Ah well, maybe I can get some work done! LOL! I think my biggest fear is the Myth that Scott debunked about them not contacting you and moving on with their lives. I mean, in my situation, I have no clue what the heck is going on. Are we together, are we not, are we talking a break? This sitting on the fence truly bites. I know I was always available for him and started to lose sight of me. I even blew off my friends, which are his friends too. I actually did TOO much for him. It was no longer him and me as a couple, but it became all about his wants and needs and while I am a compassionate person, eventually it was going to fall apart because I have wants and needs too. I am a rational person, who can be a little too in touch with her emotions. "Passionate and Intense" my sorta bf called me. "Throw my all into everything" I call it. Whatever. Difference of opinion. But still, as rational as I can be, I have been going around with my phone crazy glued to my hand. Yesterday I finally set the annoying little gadget in my purse and ignored it till this morning. I walk away and leave it on my desk. I hate him being able to control me via electronics. I deleted him our of the phone and off my contact list. I do not need to be reminded of the fact that he is not contacting me while I am trying to rediscover the strong minded and independant woman that attracted and made him have to have me in the first place. Still, not talking to him makes me feel empty, so I talk to others. I thought about drafting texts to him but not sending them, but since I removed his number it now takes too much effort to type in the number. Now if I could just remove the number from my memory with a spork, it would all be good. Ugh. Hope I am not sounding like a whiner here. Trying to keep my spirits up and blab all the thoughts in my head. Purek on "Purek's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/pureks-nc-diary#post-14584 Tue, 24 Nov 2009 11:22:11 +0000 Purek 14584@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ My ex and I have been broken up for 2 months, we had a 7 month relationship. I had to go over to his place b/c he doesn't have a car so we could exchange stuff finally. I was surprised at how un-emotional I was...I just played it cool. He greeted me with a hug (I just let him hug me) and said that he missed me. He likes my new haircolor too. We had to go to his friend's to pick up something of mine, so we had some drive time. He wants to be "just friends" and still do everything that we used to do minus the romantic stuff. Whatever...so I dropped him off on my way home (he gave me gas money) and said that we should hang out soon. I said "ok" then he hugged me again and I only half-hugged him. The next morning I texted the NC message. That afternoon he answered "ok.." I feel really good. Like that chapter is finally closed. This is our second break up and I'm not even sure if I want him back. So I have nothing to lose by doing NC, I've already lost him as my bf. First day of official NC, YAY!!! Surfiechick on "Surfiechick's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/surfiechicks-nc-diary#post-18233 Wed, 30 Dec 2009 23:57:18 +0000 Surfiechick 18233@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Day 6 of No Contact Okay well I wont repeat what I just posted in my Break Up Story. Not sure if I am on day 6 or day 14 - but I sent my No Contact Letter on 17th December, however I have had contact since then due to circumstances, but reiterated my need for space and my acceptance of the break up on 23rd. My last contact from my ex was out of courtesy on Christmas Day (a thank you for the presents i sent with him for his family - already bought before the break up). I replied very matter of factly - saying they were welcome (as in his family not him) and did so in a way that invited no further communication from him. I have good moments and bad moments. Today is a bad day. Meant to be going out in an hour and havent even got near the shower yet. Forcing myself to go to the gym and down to the beach everyday. I know he will be back in town either tomorrow or Saturday and I am dreading how I am going to feel when he is back. Holding out for a "New Year's" text but I know its wishful thinking. Will try and put on a brave face tonight as will be in the company of his flat mate - best go make myself look drop dead gorgeous. <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_wink.gif" title=";-)" class="bb_smilies" /> Be strong everyone - and Happy New Year! Rosie on "Rosie's Get a life diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/rosies-get-a-life-diary#post-23304 Tue, 23 Feb 2010 14:20:44 +0000 Rosie 23304@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I tried over 15 months ago to initiate no contact with my ex and guess what, I did absolutely everything I shouldn't have done, not only that through this process of pathetic, out of character behaviour I feel I have lost part of myself, do whilst I would like to get my ex back, I'd like to do it on my terms and spend the time working on myself. I decided on Sunday night that I wouldn't contact my ex again. Monday I wrote the NC letter and today I have mailed it out. I have had no contact with my ex for 2 days and already I feel I am getting back into my life. I had so many projects left on hold because I was obsessing about this man all the time. Even after two days of no texts I feel like I am getting my own life. I don't feel like dating yet, but I have arranged for my girlfriends to come over for lunch tomorrow and next Thursday and I plan to take a look at all the hobbies I have put off and all the places I would like to visit and schedule them into my life. I have turned off my personal mobile off! I am just looking at my phone twice a day..hey...I am not waiting for calls and texts. I am getting a life. If a friend dies..they have my work number :lol:, the crash team know where I am!! :P. Since I have done so many things wrong with my ex and he too..then I think this NC should last at least 6 months even a year. It has been hard today not picking up the phone to chat about this and that, hey..I think I have a few other friends I can call!!! Tomorrow is my birthday and on Sunday is his...that will be a challenge, but I am not replying to any texts or calls and I am not sending any greetings for is. NC means NC!! Leeka on "Leeka's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/leekas-nc-diary#post-23810 Fri, 26 Feb 2010 15:00:36 +0000 Leeka 23810@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I sent the NC message, word for word. This is day 1 of NC. I feel strong and to be honest, I am not sure I really want him back. I know this process will help me realize exactly what it is I do want and that's awesome. I have been focusing on myself. I am angry at myself for letting myself go during the relationship, something I promised myself I wouldn't do. I have been working out again, eating better and hanging out with friends. It has been hard, but everyday it gets a little easier. I haven't yet received a response from the NC message. Dave on "My no contact diary." http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/my-no-contact-diary-9#post-24632 Sun, 07 Mar 2010 14:40:32 +0000 Dave 24632@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ 3-7-2010. So I am going against everything that I feel and sent the NC letter. I can admitt that I was secretly hoping that she would have responded to me. I have bargaining with myself saying maybe she has not checked her email yet? Or that I am pushing her even farther away. I have mixed emotions about this. Empowered yet very...very...scared. admin on "SWs NC (No Cocktails) Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/sws-nc-diary#post-9448 Thu, 15 Oct 2009 09:13:58 +0000 admin 9448@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Today is my birthday and I am giving myself a present...I have decided to stop drinking every night. I have watched all of you struggle to evolve, and now it's my turn. While you kick loves ass...I will start kicking liquors ass. Why? Because I am tired of it kicking mine. <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_twisted.gif" title=":twisted:" class="bb_smilies" /> I know our forum isn't for addiction recovery...but then again it is about getting your life back, right? This bad fucking habit started out of loneliness...just like many of you who started doing bad things to compensate for some kind of pain in your life. I am no different. The funny thing is that I don't drink all the time...only at night when I watch movies. This is more of a mental addiction than it is a physical one. I even had counseling and told the doctor how much I drank...but after all our sessions he said I wasn't an alcoholic...I was lonely. Me...I think it is just a habit like smoking was...I was used to doing it daily, and just needed to reprogram myself. Easier said than done, right? Now don't get me wrong I still want to get wasted from time to time...because I like it. <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_razz.gif" title=":P" class="bb_smilies" /> But I want to be the master...not the slave in this relationship. I have done it before...but because of things I have been going through these past 22 years. I slowly sink back into the pit. Not this time. After seeing how I could help others help themselves, I know I am not just a fuck up (like I used to think)...and all you members have inspired me. This is one relationship I don't want back (the daily drinking)...I just want my life back again. Does anyone understand what the liquor commercials mean by drink responsibly? How the fuck does that work, anyways? <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_cool.gif" title="8)" class="bb_smilies" /> So let my personal evolution begin! lizzie-bee on "Lizzie-bee's no contact diary!!!" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/lizzie-bees-no-contact-diary#post-25192 Sat, 13 Mar 2010 10:40:24 +0000 lizzie-bee 25192@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I'm feeling really positive as I am 100% sure this will make him realise he does have feelings for me!!! Although I'm slightly confused, we started no contact on monday 8th march, agreed no contact for 2 weeks. (This is the 3rd attempt at n/c as he broke it, then I did several times!!!) Should I send the n/c message now even though i already did something similar monday. He promised to call in 2 weeks, got about a week left until he does, should i reply to his phone calls with the no contact message then?? If i send that message now he'll just think I'm breaking it again!!! HELP!!!!!!! lizzie-bee on "Lizzie-bee's break up story" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/lizzie-bees-break-up-story#post-25190 Sat, 13 Mar 2010 10:17:44 +0000 lizzie-bee 25190@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Well me and Rob knew each other from school, he was the first person I ever kissed and back then he was a horrid 17 year old. Once leaving school we didn't keep in contact, we hated each other and I never thought we'd speak again and to be honest it didn't even bother me. Then last July I logged into my Facebook account and recieved a friend request from him, I was rather surprised!!! I accepted it out of curiosity and he happened to be online, so I said to him "come on then whats going on, why have you requested me as a friend??" Well after that we spent 6 hours on there chatting and catching up, next day he was online waiting for me and i spent 8 hours chatting to him. this went on for about a week, he said he was addicted to me, i finally found an excuse to give him my phone number and 4 hours later got a text from him asking to meet. We met up that weekend and it was magical, it was like we'd never been apart, he said he thought he was falling in love with me, from that moment on we were inseparable, everything was amazing for the next few months. However I started to notice something was wrong, he spent every spare minute with me but never once said he loved me. We had a drunken conversation one night and he said then he loved spending time with me and he thought he would end up falling in love with me but he didn't love me right now. After that things were ok but nowhere near as magical, this because deep down I was worried I think. He told me he had only ever loved one person and they broke his heart, after that he never loved anyone not even his ex who he was with a year and a half. Anyway we carried on for some months, christmas was amazing but on new years eve he got drunk and told me he didn't love me and we ended up breaking up. He was so ill on new years day he couldn't go home, both of us were very upset, he begged and pleaded with me to stay friends, he said he loved me but wasn't in love with me, he said he really wished he was as i was amazing and perfect, he said I was his best friend and his soulmate, both of us sat next to each other crying our eyes out and hugging each other and then agreed later that day it was worth another try. After the shock of such a horrible new years eve though, I was very down, I had problems at home with my step dad and was just not my happy self because i was so scared of losing him, things went from bad to worse, he spent less time with me, he started going out with his friends more then 3 weeks ago i asked him if he really wanted to be with me. He said no, he didn't love me, he said lately he didn't even miss me. he came to see me the next day and we both cried, he sat there holding my hand the whole time, he begged me to stay friends, said he still wanted to spend time with me. We agreed then not to speak for 2 weeks. He said he really hoped his feelings change and he misses me, he said if they did he would be back quicker than a heartbeat. Anyway basically last few weeks, I begged and pleaded a couple of times, got very upset, then realised i was pregnant and phoned him in a right state, then promptly had a miscarriage. Basically had raging hormones all over the place, but he said himself not to be sorry about getting so upset as it was probably hormones. He rang a few times to see if i was ok, last time I spoke to him was Monday 8th of March, I kept phone call happy and positive, we agreed no contact for 2 weeks. I really do believe he does have feelings for me but is afraid. Also I know deep down he thinks he can stay friends and come back to me whenever he wants. I know if I can get him to realise what he lost he will come back, we are truly soulmates!!! Rocky on "Rocky's Break Up Story" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/rockys-break-up-story#post-25187 Sat, 13 Mar 2010 09:42:45 +0000 Rocky 25187@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I broke up with my ex last year in July 2009. We were in a LDR for 3 years. The reason I broke up with her was because I had a new job and was focusing on developing my career & the long distance travelling was very difficult for me as I didnt own a car then (7 hours by bus, one way). We never contacted each other after the break up. Then in Dec'09 I started to think and miss her, I realise that I was still in love with her and was a big mistake I have done. I tried calling her but her phone was dead. I ended sending her a small Christmas present with a note to call me back once received. She called me back on Christmas eve sounding all excited to hear from me. We update each other on normal stuffs..work, family. Then I asked her if we could be a couple again as I really love her and that I was sorry for how things ended last time. She told me she just went steady with a guy from her office. She just wanted us to be friends. Found out that it was this same guy that have a crush on her for years. She never accepted him back then as she said he was not her type (nerd ,no sense of style, never had a girlfriend before and very stingy)and she does not feel anythng for him. Now they are dating!!! OMG!!! Is this a rebound relationship? Cause this guy is looking for a wife desperately. I did all the mistakes mentioned in your website (texting, calling, etc) and she was ignoring me all the while. Then I came across TW Jackson website. After a few days of silence I called her and she answered. I told her that I agree to the break up and that we should be friend as what she had wanted. She said 'thank you'. Then one day I called her and said we should meet up in Jan'09. She agreed. I drove 4 hours to meet her for a few hours only. But it was worth it. I showed a happy face all the time and bought her an expensive handphone (hers was stolen, she didnt have cash to buy a new one) which she accepted happily. She even told me she had a good time meeting me. I did asked her (with happy face) if she was serious with this new boyfriend. She gave me an unsure look and said "Anything can happen, I will let you know". Now I am confuse. What does this means? am i a friend with benefits? Cause she accepts all my gifts. After a few days later I started to do the crazy texting and calling again, which she ignored and I felt bad for not able to control myself. She has told me to date other girls and not waste my time on her. She said her new boyfriend let her do whatever she wants and they never argue. I have started NC for 6 days. I have just posted the NC letter today morning. I have enroll myself in martial arts class (always love it) to forget about her. I have been going out more often with friends. I have been keeping myself busy at work. I have been trying to keep a positive outlook but somehow it still hurts and I cannot forget about her. Katka on "Katka´s NC diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/katka%c2%b4s-nc-diary#post-21900 Fri, 12 Feb 2010 13:32:24 +0000 Katka 21900@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ My boyfriend dumped me at New years eve - 31.12.09, after 2 years of our relationship. The reason was his scare of really serious relationship and marring. He wanted to stay be friends. So we did. First 14 days we saw each other trough Skype (4cca times). I did not cover my emotions. I never cry in front of him, but I said my truly feelings. I never was the first one who start to call or write the messages. He was writing me messages on FB cca 4 times per week until I send him NC e-mail. I decided to start NC, after he send me FB message with sex offer - 05.01.10 (one month later we break off). I put my Skype and facebook to offline status. Than was 3 days calm. The 3th day I got message to my phone about our economy, and question If I am OK. I politely replied for finance side, and answer him yes, I am OK. After 2 days calm. The 5th day I got a message to my phone. That he is worry about me, he saw me in a dream, he wanted to know if I am Ok, because not all the people are good. I did no replay thanks advice from this sites. (This message he sent probably after he saw on my facebook profile, that I published adding myself as a member of group "Live For Today, Because Yesterdays Over, And Tomorrow May Never Come :)" and adding a friend - rapper who has a lot of pictures with graffiti) After 2 days calm. The 7th day our friend put on Facebook pictures with me from one action. Where I were before 2 days. On one picture I am there with one another girl and another 3 guys. My ex boyfriend wrote under the picture: "I wish all of you the best...!!!" That harted me, even if I do not why exactly, but I hope his wish will came be truth. Psychically I think am doing well. I am work on my "new life". ...I start to do belly dance, I do a lot of talk with my family, I go often clubbing and see my friends. Off course I still love my ex boyfriend and I have pain but If I have to be strong. Another way, I am gonna false. Right? <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> nf on "nf's no contact diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/nfs-no-contact-diary#post-25161 Fri, 12 Mar 2010 22:25:58 +0000 nf 25161@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I sent him NC email this morning and guess he will read it tomorrow morning (my time). He is in US and I am in China. What should I do? No tears, no sadness, no waiting... We are both Shanghainese, but he works in US. We are very serious about the relationship, but we just dated three times and kept in touch for two months. He is not confident about our future. Will NC work on us? marypoppins on "MaryPoppins NC Control Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/marypoppins-nc-control-diary#post-20513 Tue, 26 Jan 2010 17:11:38 +0000 marypoppins 20513@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Hi all. My ex and I broke up officially at the beggining of Jan, however in his eyes its was at the beggining of Dec, however during that time I asked him to think about it and we regulary spent time together including Christmas. We offically ended the relationship at the beggining of Jan, however as he has a past of depression I have stayed in contact to look out for him, as i'm worried he has it again. Anyway 5 days ago we met as he said he didn't want to hear from me anymore and had started dating again. I sent him a goodbye email 4 days ago and haven't text him since, however since finding this website I did send him the NC message last night - so this is now 1 day on. We have been together on and off for the past 4 years, however for the past 2 years, have been so close, talking about marriage and forever. His grandad died at the beggining of Dec, and the split came as such a surprize that I wonder if this is related. Anyway I love him so much and would do everything I could for him. He always said i was too good for him and that hes doing this split so that maybe one day in the future we can be together and have a good future. I'm just not sure I can wait that long (hes saying, a year at least) so trying this to sort my head and try and get him back. leafy on "Is there still chances of him getting back to you when he has a new girlfriend?" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/is-there-still-chances-of-him-getting-back-to-you-when-he-has-a-new-girlfriend#post-25015 Thu, 11 Mar 2010 00:16:42 +0000 leafy 25015@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ My ex has a new girlfriend just a week after we broke up and i didn't know it all along till recently. I called and asked him about this new gf of his. I admit, i was kind of jealous in the first place and everyone around me including him could see that i was jealous. I know being jealous over your ex's new gf/bf is definitely a mistake, but i did apologized to him about being jealous with his new gf and told him that i sincerely give my blessing to both of them. i was with my ex for 6 months before we broke up. we broke up due to some trust issues and i kept invading his privacy like getting in to his msn/facebook, but when i realised my mistakes it was all too late, he said he won't give me any chance and he's sort of like saying both of us are not meant for each other because of our education background. His education background is much lower than me but i don't mean this factor at all. Ever since we broke up till now, he has been reading my blog everyday. He's with this girl for 2.5 months and they seems to be very happy. i just want to know is there still chances of getting him back? i'm also trying to ask whether anyone have encountered this problem where your ex started having a new girlfriend shortly after both of you broke up? Is there still chances of him getting back to you? sparklemama on "Sparklemama's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/sparklemamas-nc-diary#post-22679 Sat, 20 Feb 2010 02:33:20 +0000 sparklemama 22679@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ So yesterday I sent my ex the official NC letter written word for word so I guess you can say today is my first official day of NC. When I first sent the letter I felt good and somewhat in control almost like finally the ball was in my court but after minutes turned into hours the good feeling started to wear off and here came my concerns and the sadness that comes when losing someone you really care about.Things with me and my ex are very complicated because we have a daughter together so while I know that when we do speak it should only have to do with my daughter I can't help but feel like I will never get passed him because keeping in touch with him even for our daughter's sake keeps my emotions in lock and he knows that. This time I am proving that I can live without him and not only to him but more importantly to myself because I have not felt like myself in such a long time, I feel like being with him and dealing with all that I have dealt with has caused me to become someone I always promised myself that I would never be... A needy,dependent person who cant seem to get herself together and who doesnt seem to love herself enough to say enough is enough.I wasn't always like this at one point in my life I was a fun loving person with no hangups I'm not sure when I made the transition to this person I have become. I am not only letting go of my ex but I am letting go of my best friend the one I called and told everything to...My go to person for everything in life. When he does call I plan on just putting our daughter on the phone and not saying one word to him at all... If we need to speak about our daughter then I will not talk about anything but my daughter. This is a true test to my strength and I am counting on myself to be able to do it my sanity is at stake here,I need this to regain my footing. The last time we hung out things seem good,almost like old times and I got the feeling that he wants something with me(what that something is I am unsure about) and I also get the feeling that he wants a family and maybe even wants to have more kids. I can't be the one to give him anything because I need a commitment and I need to know that no other woman is going to come along and he is going to go off chasing the first piece of tail that smiles at him and shows him some affection.I can't deal with any cheating or lying and I will not settle for less then what I want this time. The last time we spoke I told him that I was going to move to another state (not to far its only two states away and about three hours from where I live now) and he told me great do what you have to do for you and our daughter.I want to leave because the cost of living where I live now its just to expensive but I feel in a weird way that I am leaving him behind and that I am coming in the way of his relationship with our daughter... However right now I only live about 35 mins away from him and he doesn't come and see his daughter all that much so hey what the heck I guess I will just go for it.I'm supposed to be checking out an apt on tuesday and I am hoping it's what I am looking for and that I get the apt.I'm not going to lie I was hoping he got emotional or begged me not to go and his lack of emotion just made it feel like he didnt care at all. It's going to be weird if I do leave not to talk to him about all the specifics like I am used to doing.I feel like if I move out of the state and also now that I have gone with NC that it's almost like I am letting him run around with whomever he wants and I am pretty fearful that when I do speak to him again that he may not want to speak to me or that he has moved on with a new woman and a new life and that I will no longer be included in his life.That kind of fear is what causes me to feel the need to call him or see him so that I can verify that he is still open and that I still have a chance and once I communicate again then I am back to square one but its not going to happen this time. The thing that is keeping me strong is knowing that NC is pretty much my last resort...He doesn't speak to me and he has no respect for me,He doesn't take me seriously because I always come back and I have yet to let him see how it feels to not have me around.I am anxious to rebuild myself to the person I was before he came along or better yet even better than what I was. I have faith that this time I will be strong and I will get to the finish line <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> Lucky Love on "Lucky's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/luckys-nc-diary#post-18903 Thu, 07 Jan 2010 19:17:41 +0000 Lucky Love 18903@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I just sent out the no contact text after already not hearing from my ex for more than a week. I sent a couple messages to her after not texting for a while, but i never properly initiated the no contact message. So, it begins...officially nf on "My short but hard LDR" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/my-short-but-hard-ldr#post-25157 Fri, 12 Mar 2010 20:44:49 +0000 nf 25157@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I just sent him NC, but didn't feel good. My bf and I are Shanghainese, but he works in New York and I am in China. We were arranged to meet by my parents' friend. He backed Shanghai in December last year for three weeks holiday and we met and dated for three times in all, but we chatted online a few times before we met. After he returned NY, we kept in touch and he almost call me every two days. I also wrote him email almost everyday. This continued for 36 days. From 13-20 Feb, he suddenly disappeared and I didn't email him either. After 20 Feb, I called him once and wrote him email (didn't blame him) everyday for a week, he replied me and said, he was quite busy and wished me to enjoy my days. I was a bit silly and pretended nothing happened. I continue writing him touching emails everyday. A week later (last Thursday), he sent me almost the same email, said he is still busy these days and will contact me when he is free. On 9 Mar, I suddenly felt bad and really missed him, so I called him. He said he wanted to break up for various reasons. He concerned about the future and we were not suitable. It was too hard for us to have a future. I said I can go abroad, first study and then work there. I tried to get the reasons and he just said we were not suitable. I said I would not give up. He said, he had some work to do and would call me when he had time. I really don't understand him. He is shy but really serious about the future. We talked about the future at the third time we met. He is happy I will go abroad with him if we are getting closer and stable. Before his disappearance, I have ever asked if we are suitable and he said "yes". He clearly said he missed me and liked me. He knows I speak frankly and I am a bit rush to show my feeling. I really want to know my faults. I pushed him too much? I wrote him too many emails? cakelady on "Cakeladys NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/cakeladys-nc-diary#post-25048 Thu, 11 Mar 2010 16:07:15 +0000 cakelady 25048@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Okay, I sent the NC letter on March 8th. It worked like a charm. He had not responded to an email I sent a week ago, but he sure responded to the NC letter!!! Funny how that works! He respected my decission and said he was sorry if sending a message went against my wishes. I did not respond and it felt great cause I am always the one who sends the last message and waits on pins and needles till he replies. It is hard though cause I worry that he will forget about me and move on, but I guess if that happens then it was just not meant to be. I really want it to be!!! I am ready to work on my personal evolution and get my self esteem back! Get my life back! I have been going to the gym, highlighted my hair, did a bit of shopping and am going to get my real estate licence like I have been wanting to do for so long!!! Its time for me! Any how, good luck to everyone! I am going to need support through all of this so I hope to meet lots of friends on this site! <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_biggrin.gif" title=":D" class="bb_smilies" /> BEAUTY on "BEAUTY's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/beautys-nc-diary#post-18257 Thu, 31 Dec 2009 13:23:22 +0000 BEAUTY 18257@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Hi this is gonna be my NC diary from today oneguy on "Forum Support Buddy." http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/forum-support-buddy#post-25128 Fri, 12 Mar 2010 16:13:14 +0000 oneguy 25128@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Hey I need a forum support buddy. JAP on "30 days" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/30-days#post-24105 Mon, 01 Mar 2010 03:28:35 +0000 JAP 24105@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I can't believe time went on so fast! it's been more than a month since the break-up and I'm not sure if it is today or tomorrow or tue 30 days of NC. Overall I made BIG changes in my life. I'm getting done things now for myself that maybe I was afraid to do in the past. Remodeled my apartment. I'm fixing the body of my car. Getting dental treatment. Changed my look. I'm playing tennis and hiking again. I'm even dating. I planned a trip to Cancun. I payed-off debts. I minimize FB's use. etc etc - Life is good to me! Yet I am not sure about reconnecting. I do think of him,not going to deny it but...it's different now. The more NC time passes by the stronger I feel, it's like yelling on his face: "I can be completely fine WITHOUT you!" lol I'll see in the next couple of days/weeks... leafy on "leafy's no contact diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/leafys-no-contact-diary#post-25004 Wed, 10 Mar 2010 20:41:46 +0000 leafy 25004@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Day 14 of no contact. I actually sent the NC message to him long 2 weeks back before i joined this forum. I have been doing quite well though i still miss him a lot. I still can't get him off my mind but i'm moving on with my life. All i can say to myself is he has a girlfriend now and he is not missing me. I really want to come back to me anyway but i really don't know will he turn back to me again. Confused on "Confused's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/confuseds-nc-diary#post-22661 Fri, 19 Feb 2010 21:29:20 +0000 Confused 22661@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ After three weeks of not contacting him, I sent the NC message this was after he ended it with me on a Sunday three weeks ago. Jan 31, 2010. Three days after he sent me a : ) that was it, I told him off in a long text message you will need to read my break up story to get the details. He has been texting me everyother day, no phone calls at all only text messages I believe to test the waters because he realized three days later what he had done and I kept my composure on the phone and didn't get upset, beg, plead, etc with him. I let him go. So after I got two more text messages yesterday, I didn't respond to either one........I sent him this: Hi, I agree with you about your decision to be single, I really believe it was the best thing for both of us. I have some big decisions to make and I need some time to think them over. I would appreciate it if you didn't contact me during this time. I will be in touch when I am ready. Almost immediately, he responded with "Need some what?" I didn't reply at all. Nothing since then........I believe the tables turned instantly because three weeks have passed with me not calling, sending any texts messages and he thinks I've had time, but I gave him that time and still he hadn't explained why he did what he did and thought he could just slither back into my life without any explanation and pick up where we left off, NOT! He knows how strong I am, and Thank god for my resilance and strong personality! It felt so good to do this today. WHen I would just ignore him he would still send text messages so that's when I knew I had to send the NC text message and be the bigger woman and let him know that I can live with or without him. Now onto evolution Yippee! : ) KC on "How to tell if a man is needy or genuinely interested?" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/how-to-tell-if-a-man-is-needy-or-genuinely-interested#post-25020 Thu, 11 Mar 2010 04:19:33 +0000 KC 25020@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Need some help from the guys out here. How does a girl know if the interest a man is showing you is genuine or because he is needy? My ex used to love talking to me initially, wanted to talk almost everyday for hours and hours and then he pulled away, which is why it was difficult for me to process what went wrong suddenly and I ended up acting confused and needy by this change. Now there is this new guy who is showing interest in me. I went on a date with him and he was also like ex telling me how strong he thinks I am and all those real admiration kind of things. He wanted to have lunch right the next day itself, which I felt was moving too fast and I declined. He now wants to meet over the weekend, I havent committed (you see I do have other plans these days <img src="http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_wink.gif" title=":wink:" class="bb_smilies" /> ) . But I am confused whether this is just interest or is it going to be a repeat of ex's needy behaviour and I am so done with that. I know men like to chase, but how do you differentiate between those who only want to chase, those who chase coz they are needy and those who chase coz they are genuinely interested. Any insights men? oneguy on "oneguys nc diary." http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/oneguys-nc-diary#post-25123 Fri, 12 Mar 2010 15:12:42 +0000 oneguy 25123@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ I am one of the unfortuante one's who actually still have to talk to her about the house we owned together. I have just about sold the property and have to talk to her about price and things in the house. So I am very frustrated that I do have to clean up our life together while she is off on a honeymoon with her new man. I know they think they are in love with each other. All i can picture is her with him being intimate. Man that makes me angry. I already feel better following the plan of nc. When i do talk to her i feel like shit and it always brings up those feelings. It hurts when she is so cold towards me. I am keeping my eyes on the prize tho and working out plans in which I can be around her new location for school. That is my only secret from her so I am going to guard it with everything I got. I have made all the mistakes before I found this website. So I am very worried I blew it. It has been one month since the break up and I helped her along the way being her comfy slippers. Now I am the one that is still left with the pain while she thinks she is in love. So when I do talk to her I keep it about the house the stuff inside and thats it. Also I am being positive and watching the clock so I dont talk to long. I am puting my whole self into this program as it is the only thing that actually makes me feel better. No one has the right advise for me or at least nothing that I want to hear. But Scott's page is such a help I'm so glad I found this site. Petvet on "Petvet's NC Diary" http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/topic/petvets-nc-diary#post-21329 Fri, 05 Feb 2010 13:58:18 +0000 Petvet 21329@http://forum.howtogetyourexbackfast.com/ Please read my break up story I just posted for a more detailed background. We dated for 6 years in high school and college, and have kept in touch over the last 35 years off and on. I've never lost my feelings for him after all these years, and I don't think he's lost his feelings for me (he named his daughter after me!). He's still married but has lived in separate states across the country from his wife for past three years. Apparently their marriage is not in good shape, but staying legally married due to economy, house is upside down etc. We were in LDR contact from Sept-Dec and I went to see him in Dec. It was the most beautiful time I've ever had. He said we were going to keep seeing each other. He called Dec. 8th and I haven't heard from him since then! No idea why. I've been sick with grief and worry. Today I sent him the No Contact letter, but worded it a little differently due to our LOONNGG relationship. I told him I assumed he got back together with his wife, or may have found a new girlfriend out west, but whatever the reason it was OK and I want him to be happy and fulfilled in his life and be with a partner who loves him and appreciates him. I told him I have to move on and let go too, and I wished him all the best. I am so sad, I feel like I lost my best friend (certainly my oldest friend) and have no idea why. I've never stopped loving him in 35 years and having a very rough time, even after 30 days of NC. PS I'm not in a relationship with anyone right now and haven't been for about 9 months. PSS I have also bought and read Magic of Making Up.